TOUGHSTUFF: I KID YOU NOT!

"My, look at all the cyberdust, Nelson!"

2010-03-15T08:21:00.000-07:00

Right. So do excuse the very long break--I would blame the exams, but if the hiatus was of any indication I have spent much longer time basking in the sun during the holidays than toil over my books to have sufficient evidence to lay the blame on studying alone for the absence.

Gosh I sure do miss my verbal diarrhea and self-absorbed posts.

Been back in dear old campus this time no longer as a fresh-eyed bushytailedwhateveryoucallthem junior, but now as a near-retiree. which is amazing, really when you think about it--how time flies, that is. It felt not too long ago when we entered all idealistic and naive with high expectations and ideals but at the same time I cannot help but feel like the journey took years though in reality it is barely more than 2 years. The concept of time obviously have eluded me since I've started the goddamn course but owell all's fine.

On a more recent note I've been so busy with the orientation I almost missed being an orientation officer (operative word being ALMOST). running around like jackasses, choreographing dances till the legs ache and I would have to end up walking alike a castrated robot, and learning so much from the juniors it's crazy. But totally worth it.

Also, over the past week I was granted the most amazing opportunity to work with 2 of the most gifted people in music I've ever seen it's almost like a dream come true. (2 of which shall be henceforth be referred to as JoJoBear and JayJayBird) I've never been so humbled and so moved before, more so after our performance this afternoon. Thanks, guys.

Now excuse me as I return to my PBL research. *groans*

Hurmph.

2010-01-08T07:27:00.000-08:00

3 months of self-denial was somewhat worth it, although I have to begrudgingly admit that I have indeed much more to learn from others.

It's strange, though. I expected a greater sense of relief--euphoria, perhaps--but looking that that sheet of paper hardly evoked any emotion on my part aside from that itsy bit of annoyance that I could've perhaps done much better have I put in a tad more effort. Still I'm glad everyone in my circle as far as I know, have passed.

And now I will have to deal with the massive paperwork, thanks to my amazingly ingenious campus who can still manage to ruin my happiness (or whatever's left of it) by encroaching into my much-precious holidays. The idiotic hospital is not making life any easier for me too. owell too much to say--i'll try to keep this post short, hmm?

Once I'm done with that its hols for me! gonna zzz now--toodles~!

Hello There HandsomeSmartWiseCool Santa.

2009-12-16T00:04:00.000-08:00

Okay so this is merely a list I compiled to remind myself why on earth I am studying while everyone's merrymaking and singing carols everywhere. If you do, however, feel inclined to be generous and are contemplating on getting any of these for me this season, I would like to urge you to squarely lose all inhibitions and run wild. After all, in this season of festivities, the looser your pockets, the happier you make this world.

And what better way to make this world a happier place by making yours truly less moody than he already is?

And now, allow me to present to you Ben's Christmas Wishlist for Year 2009:

Robbins & Cotran's Atlas of Pathology

No self-respecting gore enthusiast/ overzealous pathologist wannabe would consider themselves worthy of mention without owning one of these babies. With over a hundred pictures of pummeled babies and squashed organs vividly pictured in full color and detailed description, this one is almost one step below cheating for all OSPE-goers. Even laymen cannot resist the bright, detailed pictures here. Plus, IT'S HARDCOVER! Estimated price: RM 150/++

And here is where it starts to get absurd:

Lotus "Phantom" Exige Scura

Granted, I may not be much of a car-fanboy and yes, it does somewhat look like a gigantic upscale model of a Tamiya car but heck, look at the matte finish and the jet black stripes across the beautifully curved vehicle and tell me this ain't going for a win. The retro-modern hybrid looks scores points in the looks department and being NOT a Malaysian car, you can be sure as hell that this ain't your typical Wira when it comes to functionality. Estimated price: RM 1M/++

D&G Black Leather Bomber Jacket

I've always advocated style and functionality and this piece certainly merits a spot on my list of drool-worthy uhm, things. Pair it up with a casual tee and you get the gangsta-cool vibe oozing outta your every pore but with a nice shirt and a tie inside, you'd exude suave while not being OTT. Having to weather the harsh, cold environment in my particular uni makes this almost essential. Estimated Price: +/-RM5k

Sarpaneva Moon-Phase Watch
If women cannot have enough bags, I'd say men can never have enough watches. Even if you do have ENOUGH watches, this is one you wouldn't want to NOT have. The adult-cold absoluteness of this watch is somewhat balanced by the almost childish moonfaces. Also let us not forget how that little child in us can never resist being able to look inside the watch, one which this item allows almost titillatingly (without tearing it apart, of course). Estimated price: i dont even wanna guess.

Shanghai Tang Dragon Cufflinks
Western-chinese fusion is always cool. and Dragons are cool, too. silver dragons on your wrist makes you even cooler. And a nice shirt paired with these cufflinks would make you the coolest kid in the boardroom, bar, etc. Oh and have I mentioned how cool these darlings are? Estimated price: RM 700/++

Plaid Skinny Jeans

Channel that inner Chuck Bass within you and walk out in style! Beware of severe crotchaches due to tight crotchgrabs from the pants and please, if your legs are stick thin DO NOT walk outta your house in these unless you want to look like a spider-monkey. Only for those whose confidence outstrips their thick skin (like yours truly). Estimated price: surprisingly, RM 70.

Shiseido Zen for Men

Girls would enjoy sniffing you, boys would turn gay smelling it on you, you'd be surrounded by adoring fans and best of all, your already stinking life would be somewhat less so. The perfect mix of feminine sweetness with masculine undertones and persistence. Smells so good you'd wanna just gulp it all down, except you'd die doing so and THAT's Zen to you. Estimated price: RM 170/++

Blackberry Storm

Anyone who says they don't want a Blackberry is a liar. Closest contender to the iPhone by far but with less reports of bugs/glitches, this is probably the better option in the long run. And since almost every powerhouse individual uses one, you can bet you'll feel like an executive/CEO just by holding one. Why, I already feel important just talking about it. Estimated price: RM 2k/++

Gucci Black Leather Drivers

My favourite of the bunch. Goes well with almost anything. and it's leather. Perfect form, almost otherworldly black beauty. 'nuff said. Estimated price: RM1k/++

more to come, maybe. until then, clean up that drool/suspicious white mess on the keyboard after reading this post.

One Day in Reality.

2009-10-19T04:03:00.000-07:00

Don't blame me for emo posts--after all, who blogs anyway when they're in throes of ecstasy? Not that I ever was in one, mind. It's simply easier to contemplate on what to say when one is all alone at home with nothing better to think of than the things that could have been or should have been. Or probably more ubiquitously (if there ever was such a word) the sense of dread and futility that comes with the territory of studies and exams.

Having said that it would be downright ironic to think that despite being in a mental turmoil my studies have surprisingly not inched down a bit. In fact I'd go as far as to say I have never studied better since, well. the last time I studied well.

The next appropriate question (assumption being you care enough to wonder) would be "what then is pricking your balls?", to which I can say "Oh, , just about everything!". "But why so?" and I would unleash a full tirade on why despite being told endlessly to appreciate the little things I have I have yet to settle down with what I have.

But really, you've probably heard this a million times before from me--So, lest I lose interest I shall move on to my social commentary.

Before I begin, allow me to describe the perfect relationship--which, of course encompasses most; be it love, friendship, kinship, etc. Family relationships work on an absolutely different dynamic, of course, and for that reason would be an exception for my observation. The perfect relationship in an ideal world would be one built solely on mutual respect and compromise with no selfish expectations on part of both parties.

But as we all know, that is rarely ever the case. In one extreme there would be perfect, absolute submission of one (or both parties) to the other party bordering on obsession and adoration, one that would nevertheless include blatant selflessness in favor of the other party. On the other side of the spectrum would be a relationship set purely for the perks--once the other party cannot contribute further, the connection is as good as over.

Unless you happen to be God (with respect to the first scenario) or an egocentric, heartless machine (second scenario) it is likely people like us fall somewhere between the two--and that will be the focus of my observation. Of course, talking about the better polarity of the spectrum would be boring at best--and hence i shall talk about the less pure, less talked about facet of relationships.

I am probably being very vague at the moment-- suffice to say from what I have observed, I would like to point out that most relationships, whether we admit it or not, is often perpetuated and motivated by selfish wants.

Take, for an example, friends. More often than not friendships form when there is a need for companionship or heck, the need to feel popular when taken in context of highschool cliques. I suppose on a more human level it is, in a sense a justification of self worth. Nobody likes to feel unliked, if you get what I mean. When love is concerned, the motivations are countless: sure, I'm not denying the possibility of pure, unconditional love; but really, don't they all begin anyway with the motivation of gaining external beauty, or riches, or even obtaining favors for oneself? Are humans not enamored by wisdom or skill and by extension would want to be as close as possible to people who are capable of such? If not, i would say even the need for closeness or intimacy is motive enough. And don't even get me started on relationships based on sex.

Human love is never unconditional--friendships, love, all selfish. Even family fails sometimes.

Sad, isn't it?

Long Time No See.

2009-09-27T08:52:00.000-07:00

Long time no see indeed--I must say for the shortest period of time I actually forgot I have a blog, what with all the things happening around me, insignificant as it may be to be worth a mention here. Gotta miss my verbal diarrhea, eh?

While we are on the topic of time, allow me to unleash a tirade of senseless rant: I'd say that these days I believe I'm becoming waaaayy to jaded and cynical for someone my age (if my previous posts were not obvious enough). People tend to annoy me easily these days, and I get bored quickly. Am I growing old? Perhaps. Disappointed with life? I'm not ruling out the possibility. Could already imagine myself sitting all on my own at the side with an scowl etched on my face going "kids these days."

Feel free at this point to state the obvious and say "but you're barely 20!". Yeah, I get it--but the problem is not my age but how I view the world thru my 20k-powered reading glasses of antiquity, if that makes sense at all.

Quarter-life crisis it must be, if ever such a thing existed. (I'm patenting this under my name first in the very unlikely situation that there's an award for discovering new disorders)

Still, it sure is better than being in denial over my age and perpetually thinking I am going to be young forever like some people *coughmadonnacough*.

Oh dear there I go again straying off-topic. (another hallmark of senesence, i should think.)

I'll try blogging again tomorrow. mind's too messed atm.

Drama-magnet.

2009-09-03T11:19:00.000-07:00

I swear I'll explain the 2-month hiatus sometime soon. Really.

But at the moment allow me to just list out a few pet peeve(s) of mine:

1) a certain lecturer who is really nice but nevertheless verbal-diarrheas a long stream of words without the need of taking in constant breaths.

2) the dramas the Orientation Committee (i.e. yours truly and 37 others) would have to constantly work OT for trying to solve and perform damage-control over.

3)the fact that (2) happens EVERY SINGLE DAMN TIME we have an event.

4) idiots.

now if you don't mind, I'd like to take a long nap and wake up say, next month?

Spank me.

2009-08-13T20:04:00.000-07:00

So it's another one of those days when I'm to bored to do anything but sit in front of the computer in the library pretending like I'm using the computer for study purposes (lest stares thrown from fuming students who couldn't use the computers are thrown at me). Of course, I should really be studying now, what with _another_ major examination coming up in, oh, say 2 week's time?

I'm not kidding when I say the bunch of notes (STUDY notes, although the other alternative would not be grudged) I have collected over the last ONE month or so could easily kill an old lady if it landed on her head.

Yet the best thing to do in life at the moment is to watch my batchmates frantically studying (even so that is an understatement) while I enjoy a slow stroll along the campus thinking about what to do over the weekend. IN fact, I'd do ANYTHING at the moment BUT study. [/sighs]

I really need to be spanked now, should I. Oyes I do. C'mon now.

spank that hawt butt of mine.

see if you can wake me up from this.

Occupieded :D

2009-07-22T08:50:00.000-07:00

So it's been awhile since I last blogged but again I must say I DO have good reasons for it. Having said that it's not such a bad thing--not updating and all--since it quite obviously means I have something better to do than stare at the computer like how some people do [/snob].

Still it's barely a month since I returned to the dreaded medschool and the mountain of notes and lectures to cover is already near insurmountable at this point in time, what more with the preparation of orientation at its most intense and also the omnipresent PBLs (sources of annoyance to be disclosed in the next post or so). And church practices.

Which begs the question how (and why) on earth did I get myself into all these things the semesters before. Powerhungry, much?

So allow me to sign off here as I crash into a lifeless heap of goo.

Maliciosus Infectiousum

2009-07-07T07:45:00.000-07:00

As I _may_ have mentioned awhile ago, new housemate's moved in and so far almost everything's fine--He seems pretty decent (definitely not as wild as the previous one ;p) and nice. In fact Animeslut did comment on how he looks agreeable to housework to which I gave a disapproving condescending look (but secretly agreed having been a slave to her for the past year). More things, of course were said about him but shall remain unmentioned to protect the PC-ness of this particular blog. *ahem*

Still, the recent turn of events gave us a new perspective on said new housemate. To put it simply, we have came to a conclusion that newhousemate is either a mermaid, a sea creature or a hydrophile due to his seemingly indiscriminate usage of water. Or he's secretly harboring a sea creature in his room. Or *gasp!* another human!

...

That could explain why he needs to wash his clothes everyday.

(various other theories are also presented but shall not be made known to protect the innocence of my dear readers-- if any.)

Best moment? When he walked around the apartment in his wet flip-flops leaving wet patches of footwork all over the place--Animeslut's constipated-gorilla look was (still is and will always be) quite priceless. Pretty much the same malicious pleasure you derive from looking at the face of an OCD-suffering person whose book arrangement you mess up. Or a kid whose dominoes you tip *accidentally*.

Gods, I love my life.

Happy Happism

2009-07-06T09:11:00.000-07:00

Right--so the sand in the vag phase is sorta over now, all thanks to housemate's HDD finally being retrieved from the depths of corruptedness. Well the previous posts have been absent as well but all I can say is the semester is doing little in keeping said housemate's and my sanity in place what with all the complexities of the human anatomy. And physiology. And pharmacodynamics. You get the idea.

And if the impression of having afternoon classes brings to mind lazy mornings dawdling about or simply lying in bed watching the clock tick, I urge you to purge that notion immediately. A workaholic I may be (I think), but these days meetings are the only few things I do not exactly look forward to--not in the morning, at least; waking up at 8+ when you could well do 11+ WITHOUT any meetings. Can't say I have nobody to blame but myself for volunteering in so many activities, but I suppose that is one of the few things that keep me from leaping off the balcony when I can't tell how the heart tube folds. And how they differ from a squashed orange (google the picture and you'll see what I mean).

While nothing else is worth mentioning at the moment, I can say that the Orientation Planning and M&P is coming up splendidly at the moment. No, really. Everything's fine in lalaland tralalala everyone's happy.

Rants

2009-07-01T08:11:00.001-07:00

Been very tired recently, and I think I may have sand in my vag**a as well. Needless to say almost anything provokes me (not outwardly, of course--nooo I'm just too cool for that) these days, and lectures are getting increasingly confusing in a strange way. No, I'm not getting dumber btw. I think.

Also, I have this feeling that I am about to dislike my PBL group. [/end rant]

Bad Start, K.

2009-06-29T06:45:00.000-07:00

Classes *finally* started today, and to be really frank I couldn't feel excited about it for all the grumbling's worth. So maybe meeting up with friends (if any) was enjoyable--heck, I daresay something to look forward to, even-- but trust me on this when I say waking up after only having 5 hours of sleep would totally change the perspective of the day (a no brainer, really).

Even normally unassuming conflicts (like passwords not registering on the computer) would lead to emotional distress for the good 5 minutes, that being said. And not to mention how everyone would start to act as though they have (to quote the great Eric Cartman) sand in their v*g*na. Also, the imminent threat of falling asleep anytime. Very tangible.

Since it was the start of the new semester, there were obviously the mandatory talks from the dean and the various faculty members sisters etc which were of course interesting but almost redundant otherwise. Then, breaking the traditional "no classes on the first day" axiom, we DID have class today. Not very pleasant to be honest, what with trying not to sleep--though the lecture in itself ain't THAT bad.

In the meantime, allow me to relate my experience today being at the wrong end of a botched up blood drawing procedure--yesssh, the victim. To put it simply, imagine having the syringe inserted within a distance of 2mm _twice_ on the same spot. It hurts more than it sounds. I'd like to say "trust me on that", but where's the fun in just telling? Go try it out! :D

Prank Calls?

2009-06-26T02:51:00.000-07:00

Okay so maybe the holidays aren't all that boring. Since our 3rd housemate left we were looking for a new housemate--which would not have been so troublesome if we knew there were "seasons" when people would actually start looking for rooms.

To put it succintly, Most of the holiday mornings I have spent waking up to calls in the vein of this:

Girl: Hello, is this Benjamin? (pronounced Bee-yen-jar-mean)
Moi: yeah, speaking.

Girl: Uhhh... How to say arr. *pause* You have a condo near IMU?

Moi: (...How I wish) You mean an apartment? Yeah (as far as I know) I do.
Girl: You still have it?

Moi: *horrified pause* (still have what? my virginity? my 'condo'?) Uh.. You mean do I still have a room to rent?
Girl: *long pause* Ah, yeah. That.

Moi: Well unfortunately the room's already taken so I'm really sorry. plus even if we DO have another room I sure as hell wouldnt want you anywhere near me kthxbye

Girl: Orrh. Okay. Bye.

Moi: (mustnotlaughmustnotlaugh) Bye.

This just happened about 3 minutes ago btw.

And its not in the morning. Sighs thank God we've already found a housemate.

OH MOTHER!

2009-06-22T11:12:00.000-07:00

Holidays are almost over, and now I'm starting to get this reaally sick feeling that I'm going to regret I wished holidays were over soon. May as well have been one of the most unproductive period in my entire life, I may venture even. But *sighs* I suppose there's nothing much to be done now, innit? Owell at least I could boast I have finished one of the best games I've ever played in my life for now, and I'm DEAD SERIOUS. Never before have I gotten misty-eyed over a bunch of bleeping and blooping pixels, damnit but I did over this one, I did.

Look at these cute lil' things and tell me that aren't made of pure awesomeness.

drag queens = win

...
Fine, go ahead and be smug and indifferent. Not all games could project emotions this effectively, mind. CONSIDERING THE GRAPHICS.

(fanboyism is real.)

Well aside from that I'm practically quite idle. I'd wait to see how long it'll take to have mould grow on me if classes aren't starting in a week already.

Life After the Struggle..

2009-06-02T10:21:00.000-07:00

...is anything but eventful, unfortunately. While my batchmates are probably basking in the sun of the Bahamas/ shopping in Tokyo / anything of equivalent value I still find myself stuck in the searing suffocating heat of my home making sense of the irony of enjoying the pressures of exams and loathing the comforts of home. If misplacing my sense of purpose is not bad enough, I should think that having dreams of the very same exam (with strange questions based on unity/music, but that's not the point) be a hallmark of my undoing. Despite having passed the aforementioned.

What am I doing, one may ask: and that is the very same question I pose to myself everyday, consciously or otherwise. It's hard not to expect anything, I suppose, considering the whole drama we went through. No one can really blame anyone for expecting life to be more eventful or enjoyable or operatic, for that matter. But I suppose it's still something I'm learning--that the world doesn't revolve around me, and life goes on even if I want an orchestra playing everytime I wake up.

But surely waking up wishing that money grows on trees just for a day isn't a bad thing?

Update :D

2009-05-13T06:55:00.000-07:00

YO! I guess things have been too hectic *coughlazycough* for the past week or so for an update what with major finals looming (now history) around the corner. Although I do admittedly miss the late night study sessions in Starbucks/McDonald's. Still, having said that I'm pretty glad its all over now anyway and I can finally get my much-deserved break and resume the lifeless routine of senseless blogging, facebooking and mouse hunting.

On the other hand I'm already getting pretty bored with the holidays (second day wtf) and the workaholic in me is pushing for more work despite it being a semester break. Meeting-addiction much? Owell no complains so far. Will *try* to update occasionally, if I'm not trying to drown myself in work. an idle mind is the devil's playground wtf

Cerebral Hemorrhaged.

2009-04-29T08:40:00.000-07:00

Been a long tiring day selling badges and screaming my lungs out all in the name of publicity for NOISE&MOVEMENT, though I admittedly enjoy doing that *coughworkaholiccough*. Still I want to believe I'm up to date with my studies as much as the pile of unread notes in the corner would suggest otherwise--psyching myself is probably all I can do at the moment anyway.

I'm begining to miss those days when studies weren't that burdensome and I had more time to actually laze around without feeling guilty sigghs.

To Singapore and Back

2009-04-28T09:18:00.000-07:00

4 days were spent shopping and generally losing the excess baggage of medical information stored in Singapore. 3 hours in total in a cramped up airplane. Less than 1 hour of total study-time.

That being said the selection process in NUS went fine, thankyou. Essay writing was pretty good (in my standards) at 4 pages in 45 minutes but I didnt exactly get to end it right due to time constraints. On a topic I am so passionate about, too--educational issues. Meh, what's done's done I suppose. Still, there's the feeling of uncompletedness lingering after the paper's collected (which in retrospect is probably Animeslut's OCD rubbing off on me).

Interview, however was NOT easy at all and I had to use every trick in the book from worn-out cliches to feigned determination or outright lies to convince the interviewers to let me through. Of course when it came to current issues those tricks were effectively rendered useless (Ha! I included irony in this post!), courtesy of yours truly not reading the news for the past 2 weeks or so. Aside from the minor hiccup *cough* I think I made a good impression. now gimme a place in medschool NUS dammnit.

And I decided that I either hate airplanes a lot or my sense of equilibrium is particularly sensitive.

On a totally different note I think I should really start studying or I'll end up being in neither IMU or NUS by the end of this year.

NOISE & MOVEMENT here I come!

Blog. Dying.

2009-04-24T09:57:00.000-07:00

Been a long week, it was. Catching up with 3 month's worth of studying in less than 3 weeks was not very pleasant, too, but I guess that was the price I had to pay for procrastination. Still, results were much better than what I deserved and I couldn't help but think that there was some degree of divine intervention being involved in the equation. The pressure was pretty much tangible yesterday, and to make things much more suspenseful for this frail little mind of mine I still had to attend an interview in my current church before serving. ON THE SAME DAY. Thankfully it went pretty well so it was worth it ultimately.

In 3 more days I'll be having attending an interview to be accepted into NUS. OH THE PRESSURE. Having said that I'll nevertheless look forward to shopping in Singapore so feel free to be envious nyahnyahnyah.

And then in less than 3 weeks it's End of Semester exams! D:

THE END: SUMMATIVE 2

2009-04-22T22:06:00.000-07:00

the end has ended. now on to the next phase of my misery. here i go EoS2!!!

Updatus :D

2009-04-17T10:46:00.000-07:00

Ah, again; do forgive my absence for the past few days--exam's close, after all. Nothing much to update on, since the fun in life have effectively came to a standstill. Having said that, however, I find the thrill of examination looming in the corner hardly containable--a hallmark of exam stress-induced psychosis mayhaps--and I find myself relaxed to the point that I have to keep reminding myself the price of failing the next exam.

The real honest-to-goodness reason updates were unavailable was really because my internet provider decided that upgrading the service (of which the improvement, if any, is hardly noticable) would be a splendid idea, taking their own sweet time tinkering on whatever they were tinkering on as I suffered in the agony of disconnectedness.

And the sin of sloth on my part.

On the plus side, less two more disciplines to cover! Wish me the best! :D

Frustrated: Angry at the World

2009-04-13T08:15:00.000-07:00

I am angry no one listens to me

I am angry I'm always second grade to others

I'm angry I couldnt do things others could

I'm angry my views are ignored

I hate the fact that it hurts so much

I'm angry I always need to rely on others

I am angry no one ever takes me seriously

I am angry I have to try so hard to be noticed

I am angry I have no one to talk to

I'm angry this is the only way i can express my frustration

I'm angry nobody cares

I'm angry no one tries to

I'm angry that no one sees why I am this way

I'm frustrated no help ever comes my way

I'm frustrated at my mediocrity

I'm angry at the fact that I am weak

I'm angry people take advantage of that

I hate the way I have to pretend just to please others

I hate the fact that I cannot show my weakness

I hate the fact that I bruise too easily

I hate the expectations

I hate the comparisons

I hate my indecisiveness

I hate the fact that things never work out the way I want it to

I hate the fact that it's different for other people

I hate being always the one on the wrong side

I hate being the good guy all the time

I hate being patronized

I hate the fact that time never heals anything

I am frustrated people will laugh this off.

Nibs

2009-04-09T09:39:00.000-07:00

Pardon the clutter; something somehow possesed me today to have the blog undergo some pretty drastic structural changes but the contents would remain as it is--all in the name of progress after all. And speaking of progress studies have effectively arrived at a standstill today due to various forms of distractions, you name it: nursing reports, PBLs, friends, and some decidedly spontaneous Sharpie-time. And American Idol. (people, you have got to understand that sympathy votes cheapen the whole show and keeping someone for a disability is not productive ultimately. Got nothing against them though.)

In the meantime the pressure to perform is getting increasingly intolerable; with about 2 more weeks to go and still so much to cover, it'll take a miracle to get whatever I want at the moment but we'll see how it goes. :D

Bored at 12

2009-04-08T08:28:00.000-07:00

Do excuse the somewhat long pointless post yesterday--all in the name of venting out ultimately giggles. Today's pretty ordinary, what with pharmaco lectures still raping me front and back and then there's the customary/obligatory lecture which serves little purpose but to ruin my otherwise productive day. Having said that walking out of lectures is quickly becoming a habit I find hard to curb, more so when precious time is being consumed by lecturers who believe telling lame jokes and speaking at snail's pace would make them a darling to our already packed timetables.

I finally had time to do things I intend to do, which most importantly includes catching up with all the accumulated workload over the past few weeks or so. And working out, too! :D

On an absolutely different note Animeslut's being stalked by a guy who seem to not notice fine line between being overfriendly and overtly flirting, and needless to say I find it amazingly amusing, since Animeslut has this tendency to be a people-pleaser (or a very good pretender. either way.). Once the person is out of her sight, however, the disgusted side comes up and becomes an endless source of entertainment.

And I really need an apartment mate now.

It's That Time of the Semester Again.

2009-04-07T08:56:00.000-07:00

Woke up today just in time to be disturbed by a senior (who really needs to do something more productive than to taunt a junior in the morning about having classes) and a (not so secret) admirer over msn. Wasted probably half an hour chatting and begging for lecture recordings before having to rush to my campus despite waking up early due to said distractions.

That said, it was probably the most interesting thing that happened to me today. On to the ranting.

I'm begining to fear for myself for the coming exams, actually. In fact, I'm questioning my ability and my passion for this profession; and more often than not I wonder if my motivations are truly noble and sufficient to keep me afloat and if struggling like this would be futile or not.

I've seen people who could do this. You just know it somehow that they have it in them; the passion, the determination, the youthful eagerness to learn (as much as I hate to admit I envy at times) and the heart for it. Which makes me wonder where did all those things which I used to have that I am seeing in other people went.

See, the problem is I don't know if I really want it this badly or not, or if I am willing to sacrifice so much for this to happen, or if I even have the capacity to do it to begin with. The worst part? If anyone were to ask me what I would do if I weren't studying this, I can honestly say I do not know. I have a friend who's a writer at the moment for an established publication, but no one would've guessed that he's also holding a degree in Biomedical Sciences. My point is, he's someone who is not in a sense confined to his degree--he just does what he enjoys and does best. Frankly, I deeply admire his ability to take on something which he enjoys which is independent of his degree. Of course, I'm not in any way trying to insinuate that I do not enjoy whatever I'm doing now, but the question I ask myself is if I had to do it another way, which path would I take?

To be perfectly honest, I still feel that I am perfectly incapable of doing anything above average--most of my works are relatively substandard in my opinion, and if anyone were to ask me if there's anything worse than bad it would be exactly this: mediocrity. Classic case of jack of all trades, master of none. Point is: I don't know what else I can do besides what I am doing now, and that is what frustrates me, more so with the prospect of mediocrity (or possibly failure) looming ahead.

Perhaps I am just overthinking--I sure hope I am. Whatever I'm doing now was bought with a lot of tears and sweat on part of my parents and myself; I can only pray I don't screw things over with my weaknesses and doubts (there's only so much I can do--but is it enough?).

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Said writer friend told me "sometimes you just need to let life be", which is ironic considering his circumstances. I myself believe that destiny is autonomous and letting life be is simply akin to sleeping while driving a car on a dark road, but that's probably where our differences lie. But as to how life goes, I don't know and I'm certain no one does either.

But maybe that's what I should do.

hope this makes sense and it doesn't bore anyone. It's not meant to mean anything anyway.

RESTARTING...

2009-04-06T08:45:00.000-07:00

It's strange how it takes only a week to tip the fine balance created over the past 2 months; now lectures seem too foreign for my taste. Still, nothing beats having a lecturer coming in half an hour later than the time stipulated and giving the most amusing lecture on "loving kindness" in a tone only a robot could match. Extra marks for getting definition to sound like damnation. Or better yet, going "Oh I thought I was going too fast for you guys" when the lecturer is, in fact moving waaayy too slow.

Ah, the times in lecture halls.

2 months, and yet it felt as though 2 years have passed by. Exam's close, too, and I should really start amping up my work if I really plan on making it through to the next semester.

Nursing Week II

2009-04-01T08:07:00.000-07:00

Post absent yesterday due to writer's inherent lazy streak. Hospital postings were decidedly a huge waste of time, since no agendas were given to participants. Naturally, aforementioned students would spend half the time wandering around wards flipping through the patient's records under the impression that things would somehow be better by doing so. If anything, the closest thing possible to an interaction with the nursing staff would be tonguelashing for being a hinderance to the duties of the staff. Which, for the record, did not happen to yours truly btw.

Ultimately, camwhoring and generally bumming around proved to be much better an activity compared to talking to patients who are too sick to respond anyway. Students are then required to write a report on what was learnt throughout the visit; a purpose which would have been apt, should the students have done something.

...

And today, being the first of April, and the day in which I do not have anymore hospital visits, was rather boring. So boring, in fact, that I managed to cover nearly half a discipline (pathology) in less than a day.

So much for a change of pace >.<

Nursing Week I

2009-03-30T07:30:00.000-07:00

Nursing week started today, and for all it's worth waking up at 6am to NOT miss the bus was not pleasant at all. More so considering how I was sporadically waking up at 3-hour intervals the night before to make sure I REALLY DIDN'T MISS the damn bus.

For the record a batchmate missed the bus and took a cab to the place we're supposed to go--the cost: 120 friggin' bucks. See why I was so paranoid about missing the bus?

I found the journey to the hospital strangely enjoyable, though that was probably due to the company I had. That, and the initial excitement of having an outing. Needless to say walking around in a coat and a shirt at 37 degrees in a stuffy ward was not my cup of tea, but I guess that's something we had to get used to--all part and parcel of the job. At least that's what I told myself as I steam myself to death. On the plus side I absolutely adore the food in the cafeteria there--almost orgasmic, and the price was the metaphorical sex afterglow wtf. Good stuff.

Language was a major issue here; evidently english was the least important language when it came to dealing with the sickkies. Thank God for Malaysian education making malay a compulsory subject--I wouldn't have stood a chance taking the patients history otherwise. Having said that, I have really got to brush up on my chinese as well or I may have to pose as a malay doctor (in my defense my malay pwns most people's) to avoid having embarassing conversations with chinese-speaking patients.

Naturally we function as roadblocks in the wards as well, in fact I'm pretty surprised how the nurses did not scream at us for being plain useless and annoyingly curious. I myself did little to help but hey at least I got to perform a general inspection (under the surveillance of seniors, of course) and took a history from a patient which others did not nyahnyahnyahlazybums. All in all, pretty tiring but that wasn't something unexpected.

Another one tomorrow! Oh God I'm royally screwed. Another night gone.

Skippus.

2009-03-26T09:28:00.000-07:00

Skipped the second lecture on some epidemiology crap to get a haircut, with disastrous results. I'm probably comparable to a convict right now with that pseudo-crewcut thing going on my head now, but that's the price to pay for truancy owell. The first lecture was horrible, and I'm discovering the joy of having the MP3 as a permanent fixature on my ears.

PBL's cool, and so is the AC. But nothing beats the awesomeness of my baby the musicroom. I could just die a happy, fulfilled life in there.

Owell too lazy to blog today.

Robberies :D

2009-03-25T09:23:00.000-07:00

Apparently robberies are happening more frequently these days, and well, I guess I really ought to be afraid but there's always this inherent thought of "not me", regardless of how close (location or otherwise) to me it happened. But of course, atmospheres are nearly always contagious, and I'm therefore invariably caught up in the brouhaha of keeping safe, cautious, alert, etc in light of this situation.

A problem, really since it means keeping the windows shut before I get to bed. And if the weather keeps going on like it is, I'll most likely be steamed to death before I could get robbed.

Either way is not very appealing to me, but owell I suppose losing a few stuff would beat drowning in my blankets anytime soon.

Classes today were somewhat okay, but everyone who spoke seemed to be afflicted with longwindedness, and of course a day is never complete without our microbiology lecturer going all "oh please guys, don't kill me, I've lectured you guys on this before" on us. Never ceases to amuse me. Even the next lecturer (a nurse, as a matter of fact) was thoroughly enjoying her own voice, but at least I was reminded that nursing week's starting in a week! Can't really say I'm excited about it, but I'm pretty sure a lot of screaming an complaining on part of the nurses working there would come my way.

Back to studies, with less than a month before the next examination, time is too precious a commodity.

Of Joyful Eruptions and Begging Lecturers (and late posts).

2009-03-24T08:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday's post was absent, if noticable to begin with but I swear I had perfectly valid reasons for that (like being horribly tired from going out windowshopping for the new garage-musicroom AND having CSUs in the morning).

AIR topic's killing me at the moment, and quite naturally I did little to lighten my burden on it yesterday, what being unconscious and all. Quite uneventful, otherwise. Today was not much of a difference, the only thing noticeable enough to warrant a mention would be the abrupt change in the weather; so annoyingly cold in the morning when yours truly was stuck reading on antimicrobials in the library (will get to that in awhile) and yet warm like excrement at night that sleeping in the buff was a rather tempting option.

So. Lectures today was mighty fine in the morning, though heavy. Hardly could remember the drugs though I have been reading on it only a few days before, but what was interesting was how a usually quiet girl erupted gleefully (and even that's an understatement) as she was answering a question a lecturer posed. Think arm-spreading, seat-jumping and audible excitement. Animeslut was understandably miffed, reason being "I answered that first!", but that's just her. Second lecture was mind-numbing, and the lecturer went into her oh-please-don't-kill-me mode. Amusing.

Antimicrobials. So much to remember and with so may strange names, too. Don't even get me started.

Complaints XII

2009-03-20T10:24:00.000-07:00

These days it could take a miracle for me to remember what we had for lectures, more so since the campus admins of death thought that putting in needless lectures on parastiology (which in my defense have already been repeated ad nauseam via lab/PBL sessions) would be a mighty fine idea. Surely there's no harm in revising a subject with practically a million names for every stage of a single worm/protozoa, but there's just so much one can take in before getting bored.

And then having a Q&A session with no lecturers present? Splendid. What were we supposed to do, sit and fester in the theatre and suddenly be enlightened?

Nay.

Still, I'm loving the campus for providing us with such a prettiful music room I can now crash in *cue cymbals* and let loose, though the instrument-moving part was admittedly not so fun in retrospect.

Note the president with camwhoring tendencies

Gotta love the red carpet.

And dinner with parents=free food=win.

!High!

2009-03-19T09:07:00.000-07:00

It would be nonsesical for me to blog about classes today, since my attendance's practically zero (for once in my campus life *sobs*). Blame it on the M&P club; not that I missed anything particularly significant, though since the first lecture was apparently one of the shortest one we've ever had and the second lecture was second to cow-feces, assuming, of course the dean's list students words are to be taken with gravity. Who wants to learn how to input data into a computer to simulate bowel movements anyway (I'm dead serious on this) ?

Then came PBL.

The facilitator's out, and the admins (who have seemingly schemed against this particular medstudent we shall refer to as myself) sent in a fug facilitator who claimed to have had experience on PBLs for the past 17 years (doubt so. PBL's been introduced only recently, no?). All's well until he cut riiight into the leader's presentation to tell us "how it's done" like we've never done it before, hence defeating the purpose of 'facilitating'.

And then he started interjecting/interrupting my elaboration and presentations. Almost everyone's, in fact.

BIG MISTAKE try again wtf. He apparently loves listening to himself, to quote a PBL mate sans the facilifailtor. Needless to say I was quite pissed by the end of it, since his dictatorial style quite simply left everyone else with little/nothing to discuss about that he wouldn't interrupt (rather rudely, if I must add).
Excuse the rant/bash combo--nothing miffs me more than people who flagrantly ignore me

Otherwise everything's quite enjoyable today--afternoon study sessions with darling friends, met up with mum&dad, went out for dinner and grocery shopping with them without paying a single cent yays and uhh yeah as you can see I'm quite easily satisfied (yeahriteliarwtf).

Going to bed now toodles tata nites kthxbye.

Posts this short can only be seen when I'm this lazy.

2009-03-18T09:35:00.000-07:00

And so ends the 3 consecutive lecture on pharmacology by the lecturer whose utterance were nigh uncomprehensible, but we were nevertheless forced into another lecture on epidemiology by the cruel admins whose syllabus-planning was the bane of my existence. Good lecturer, bad subject to lecture on. 'Nuff said.

Lunch was rather different today seeing as to how none of the sluts were present--I did, however help my other (less annoying) housemate move out. Sad to see her leave but owell.

And then I spent my whole afternoon studying a seemingly difficult lecture on pharmacology only to discover that I have arranged my pharmaco notes back to front. Which probably explained the unnecessarily steep learning curve.

If the previous 10 posts of so weren't clear enough, let's clarify this, shall we?

pharmacology is a pain in the *bleep*.

Monotony to the nth degree

2009-03-17T08:36:00.000-07:00

You know you're assimilating into the life of a campus student when you acquire the nonchalance associated with skipping classes and the ilk. I know I have, which is unsurprising, really, seeing the crowd I hang around with.

But then again, lab sessions are hardly anything one would look forward to the first thing in the morning. And sleep justifies all reason to skip one measly lab session, I reckon. Friends are of course indispensible assets in this scenario, since they were the ones covering my behind.

For all its worth, the lectures for the day literally put me to sleep anyway--the first one's barely tolerable, and I actually slept after the first quarter of the second lecture on pharmacokinetics, woke up after 5 slides, and stuck my earphones in for the remainder of the lecture. He wasn't bad, really, but hardly anyone understood him. Even afternoon study sessions did little to help on my part.

Owell such is my life

Circa Ante Meridiem

2009-03-16T09:58:00.000-07:00

Waking up a few minutes before the alarm actually rings can be one of the most unfulfilling things one can do in a day. Just imagine--waking up knowing that you still have a smidge time left to sleep only to be jolted awake 3 seconds later by the surprisingly annoying sound of alarm. Guess you just got to accept the fact that the circadian rhythm screws you over at the worst possible time.

And knowing the fact that there will be classes (and PBLs) waiting ahead makes getting out of bed all the more difficult. I never really got why the classmates loved the pathology lecturer to begin with--sure, he doesn't suck as much as some, but he definitely ain't that good either. Needless to say my thoughts strayed off ever so often during said lectures--as always.

Later had a meeting with the M&P (Music & Performance) club to discuss some matters about the transition of power and the likes of that--while it proved to be much more occupying than lectures, I again ended up having to do quite a significant portion of work.

Which I have completed in less than 3 hours thereafter, even before the secretary could call me to remind me of the job (superworker much?). Early work was never this satisifying *smugs*.

PBL was meh, lights went off during the first half of it and the facilitator ended up giving us the learning issues for this week without much discussion. Yay to lazy/bored facilitators. Yay to afternoon naps. Nay to mugging and bad dinner thereafter *dies*.

yawns

2009-03-12T10:06:00.000-07:00

Probably one of the more productive days of the week--discounting the fact that I woke up slightly later than usual. Lectures were okay; Immuno's actually becoming tolerable, but the admins again decided that getting someone with pronounciation problems would be mighty fine lecture on pharmacology (names, names, names).

But PBL's cancelled!

And so for once afternoon study sessions were actually viable. Covered the lectures for the day, too--and that's something, seeing as to how it is during these periods that I am doing anything but mugging. Still, it's the same old routine again after that, and that really sucks.

It's 2 now. Going to bed.

Positively speaking...

2009-03-11T08:58:00.000-07:00

I am inclined to think that early mornings are a bliss with hot blueberry muffins and a comforting veil of silence in the campus--nevermind the fact that MMS was conveniently forgotten in that picture. Alas, nothing lasts forever; as such when class begins and thats when the personal silence make way for the more busy, less contemplative side of a medstudent's life.

Classes can be enjoyable pockets of silent meditation, too--just ask the ones who could fall asleep during lectures. As much as I would love to do that (as always), the fact that the lecturer did not upload her slides to be downloaded meant that the dusty notebook in my bag is to be used again--finally. Therein went the lecture on autoimmunity, something mentioned so many times in series I have loved, it seemed like meeting a friend you have only heard so much about.

Of course, the next lecture on the healthcare system decidedly killed the absurdly jovial mood I was in after the first lecture; evidently boredom is never too far away.

Then came the chatty afternoon sessions with my friends conveniently guised under what we would call studies. Study did we, definitely; but who's to say how much we have? Much more productive, surely, was the idle gossips and senseless teasings, punctuated only occasionally with shushes laced with fury by the poor studious somebodies; who were forced to listen to our muffled peals of joy they can only envy while they drown themselves in a sea of colossal tomes

The simplest things can be so fulfilling, no?

Sickus

2009-03-10T08:43:00.000-07:00

Well of course life goes back to the way it was before orientation, save the fact that I am actually sick. Which of course would not have been so bad if I weren't so behind in my studies and will be having a major examination in 8 week's time.

And then there's waking up to a phonecall from a classmate asking if I was attending class or not and realizing that class was about to start in 5 minutes time today. Oh and discovering that I missed a CSU (that's clinical skills unit to the uninitiated) session, too.

And realizing that fever has set in.

Not really my day, if at all.

At last.

2009-03-07T07:32:00.000-08:00

All the pain, all the frustrations, all the sweat and tears.

Begone.

For it is done.

In the end I was the only one standing, but it made things so much clearer; it made me stronger.
Now it's my turn.

Weekend=fail

2009-03-01T06:45:00.000-08:00

When I signed myself up as an orientation officer I certainly did NOT expect getting orientated myself, what since I'm a senior myself. Obviously I was under the wrong impression, if the absence of a post the previous Friday were an indication. Don't get me wrong, though--it's fun as heck (not to mention flattering *winks*) to be an officer, but not so much so when it I have to actually participate the very games I have hoped to avoid when I signed myself as said officer (which brings to mind one of my less noble motivation: to watch the juniors suffer while I remain unharmed).

But the commitee really outdid themselves this time--a horror movie before treasure hunt at night? Genius. A decent one, too, if I may add. But of course running about like a group of rabid dogs looking for clues and ransacking the gym wasn't my cup of tea--more so when the clues are not there. (and the fact that I need to use the gym sometime later). And then there was waking up early in the morning the day after the night hunt for yet ANOTHER treasure hunt!

Seriously, now. Who in their right minds would want to run about in a park barely a few hours after already doing so the night before? Apparently we would. Jonny's face (one of the fellow group officer who have was on-duty that day) when asked to do 30+ pushups just as he arrived pretty much summed up the whole day.

Tiring week, this was.

Lectures? Bah, I'll focus on staying alive while keeping the group afloat for now. (yesIdoattendlecturessopleasestopaskingmeifIskiplectures).

Breaking Point.

2009-02-26T08:19:00.000-08:00

Notice the abscence of a post yesterday: the job of an orientation officer, it seems, is not something to be taken easily. Waking up earlier than what one would to train the juniors in first aid, and then skipping meals and staying on campus all the way up to midnight is only half of the pain.

And then there's the inherent danger of losing my voice and sanity, whichever comes first. And keeping the group morale up as they themselves experience the very same exhaustion--well, that's just not easy. Throw in the fact that a few members of the orientation group have had their car broken in and belongings stolen and that's pretty much a breaking point for any normal being, officer or junior.

But I'm surviving. And keeping my hopes high--it's just too early to burn out.

I guess my seniors left me a pretty huge shoe to fill up.

Not funny at all..

2009-02-24T07:25:00.000-08:00

Medschool takes great pleasure in seeing me struggle to stay awake as they continuously deluge me with clinical classes or lab sessions in the morning, I begin to realize as I attended the nth early morning lab session of the week today--unusual, really, considering how exciting lab sessions are and how any trace of exhaustion is immediately erased (temporarily) when it's lab time. Of course when it comes to just viewing microscopic slides and nothing more, all initial enthusiasm goes down the drain and it becomes a chore. Having to wake up early did NOT help at all.

For today, it was that, and the dread-anticipation-excitement of meeting the juniors I'm in charge of for the next 2 weeks. Quite a quiet bunch, I must say; hardly exciting at all come to think of it, but I'm keeping my expectations high, since we were probably like that on the first day anyway. Oldslut and Queenslut did not go easy on the poor noobs for being so, though and I pity them somewhat--but hey, someone has to be the one dishing out the tough love ultimately.

And being the responsible senior I am I actually skipped my first lecture to attend to them (something that proved fruitless come to think of it). Rest assured however I attended the second one, but nearly slept through it (logic being that when a lecturer reads from the slides they aren't exactly lecturing, and I could well read it myself--faster, in fact-- thank you) but since yuyu-sempai told me to listen to her I had to bear with it.

And then there's having to train said juniors tomorrow in first aid (in the morning!), preparing for PBL and of course joining them for icebreakers.

I may just die tomorrow.

one of these days

2009-02-23T07:20:00.000-08:00

Ever had one of those dreams where you wake up in cold sweat but realize after a while it wasn't so bad after all? Well I had one today, but all's well since I had to wake up earlier for CSU ANYWAY--which in retrospect was not too bad either, since for the first time in my life I actually got to administer drugs intramuscularly (i.e. using syringes)

For the kid who always wanted to play with those, it was like a fat kid in a candyshop. But ah, as all beginners do, my first shot anything but perfect; the needle in fact hit the bone (which, according to the nurse in duty would cause "extreme pain" to the patient so oops.). Subsequent trials went about more or less about the same, at one point even being bent by the force of my stabbation (yes here's to inventing words again. Cheers.)

Still, a day in medschool wouldn't be complete without a boring lecture now, would it? Then came a semi-useless class which nearly rendered me incapacitated (with sleep), simply because Q&A sessions don't really work if there weren't any question to be asked to begin with. And then someone would make it even more of a nuisance by asking a pathology question in a microbio Q&A. The people in my batch, it seems, never fail to annoy me in all tangible ways.

The second lecture was much better (typical of any other day), though I am getting increasingly annoyed with the soldier/immune response analogy--cliche? I must admit, however the pictures of abscesses did intrigue me somewhat--as does everything else disgusting.

Anyways.

We'll be meeting the juniors tomorrow!

Mayo Clinic~~

2009-02-19T09:30:00.000-08:00

I swear the lecture hall wasn't this cozy before--the temperature just about right, lights were dimmed, and the lecturer had this voice that could put anyone to sleep--more so since I was already feeling tired from inadequate sleep to begin with. Ah, pathology. Such an interesting subject, too.

blister on the ventral region of the feet

Immuno's next, and although I wasn't particularly excited about it, it was rather...okay, save the fact that a temporary lapse in attention nearly cost me the lecture.

Lunch was as usual, but Queenslut did get himself into a fix this time and became the butt (oops pun not intended--inside joke) of our jokes due to a certain..offer he got from a certain staff. But I shall protect his privacy for now ;P.

Well that's about all for today, I guess.

(i'm sick of titles)

2009-02-18T08:32:00.000-08:00

Same old day with same old routines, probably the only difference being lunchtime, which was rather impromptu this time around; even the circle of friends were not the usual people I hung out with. Not that it's a bad thing, of course, considering how it has been quite awhile since the last time we had chats revolving lectures and inside jokes on medicine (medstudents are admittedly quite elitist, as a matter of fact).

The wallet suffered huge weight loss as a result of my compulsive drive to spend on food, but at least the food is going somewhere (hopefully). Alas, plans to study in the afternoon were ruined by the same impulse, this time to have my nap.

Gym was much later, and thankfully my boobs are not hurting me as much as it did a week ago, although the session today did give me another reason to not use the gym in my campus: and that's 'cuz huge, hairy, sweaty people who go topless leave sweatstains on the benches, and I don't mean little ones that one can ignore easily.

Well enough rambling for today, microbiology's still a loong way more to go before I catch up >.<

The House of Fun and Joy :(

2009-02-17T07:44:00.000-08:00

These days life has been so uninspiring I'm actually running out of adjectives to even describe it, what more write a blogpost about it. If this is an indication of things to come, let's just say I could fill up the post everyday for the remainder of the year with "same ol', same ol'" and it would probably be apt (or at least be a fair description) all through.

But inspiration comes at the most unexpected of times, such like 1 in the morning after a late night (early morning?)snack. Housemates make life so much more bearable, and conversations are never a routine but very much a matter of spontaneity, as does cheap laughs at the expense of unknowning classmates (or fairly commonly, members of our own circle).

Complains are oft along the lines of unneeded lectures "if they tell me again to wash my hands another time in the lectures, I'm gonna DROP DEAD" or anatomically incorrect jokes, involving an ungodly amount of crass made-up maladies "p**sytitis". Occasionally jokes are directed at the lecturers themselves, but most of them involves me performing lewd acts with asthethically-challenged lecturers, something I have learnt to live by. Complaints are aplenty, too, which is rather natural, considering the paradoxial nature of medical textbooks "MARIEB IS SUCH A LIAR!" and the glut of information "ZOMG STAPH AUREUS CAUSES LIKE, EVERYTHING!!", even about friends "KOREANSLUT IS LIKE THE FEMALE VERSION OF FATSLUT!(sorry inside joke here)".

All in good spirit, of course. In all sense, if you get what I mean.

As for lectures today, well, I have just about enough of disease prevention and washing hands--at this rate we'll be graduating in radiation suits lest we get infected by the plague or something. Admin has got to get the clue that yes, we are swimming in a festering pool of microbes; but that hardly means we need 3 lectures on *washing hands*. Immunology's fine so far, but we're all bracing for the worst.

Until then, buhbyes!

Mind sterilizing ain't such a good idea after all.

2009-02-16T07:46:00.000-08:00

I am under the impression that migranes are an occupational (study?) hazard when it comes to medschool. If they're not drowning you with loads of contradictory (medicine is, sadly, ridden with paradox) statements/facts, they would be filling up all the precious time with needless lectures on, say, disinfection. And throw you into PBLs (or anything of the ilk) right after that.

Which is what happened today, anyway. Gone were the days when classes were actually interesting (save for BS, but even so there are exceptions)--but then again, I'm probably already growing old and cynical a la Dr. Gregory Youknowho (which is what I aspired to be anyway owell).

As a sidenote, the new batch's coming in next week and I'm personally rather excited to see what's in stall for them and my bunch of dysfunctional friends whom I have taken great pains to even get them to register as Orientation Officers. And Dirtyslut was christened today. hurrah.

Sour grapes..

2009-02-14T12:00:00.000-08:00

..I am not. Surely, it must feel euphoric to spend a bomb to show someone you love him/her. Better yet, to make said person feel even better by actually doing it ONCE a year. Oh, how amazingly fulfilling it must be, to show the world that affection can be evaluated by the number of roses/cards/chocolates you receive!

Woe betide those who are inundated with heavy workload, ones unloved; ones that are disfigured beyond the human's capacity to be of concern, or *gasp!* God forbid, ones with oaths of celibacy! For theirs, is the fate to be locked up at home and be shunned from the festivites of the season--to be exiled from the joy of being paraded around like a princess born to a oft-thought barren queen! Unthinkable! Such depravation! Choise or not, it is an end no-one would ever hope for.

Sour grapes, am I not?

I extend my hands; more so my heart to those broken by circumstances, to those whose life is shattered when the ones they loved walked through the door--never to be seen. My soul grieves for the lonely bride, widowed by life's cruel game; and I weep for the crying girl whose denial was an ounce too heavy, as does she.

Sour grapes,I am.

*************

Brainlock.

2009-02-13T10:03:00.000-08:00

Waking up early was never one of the things I could pride myself in doing without being motivated sufficiently, but today was an exception. Nevermind the fact that I went back to sleep anyway; which in retrospect would have been a wise choice to take since the first lecture of the day (Pathogenic Mechanisms and Infectious Diseases) was a huge blur to me (I was fully awake, mind).

But I guess the lecturer sets the pace of learning for me, as much as I would love to deny the statement.

Skipped lunch (and breakfast) for CF right after class, which was about 1pm at that time. CF ended at 3 (I shall spare thee the details), after which I rushed to attend the First-Aid Training, and I was invariably late by about an hour or so, and ended up learning little bits of information here and there while spending the final half an hour or so listening to music and chatting.

summary: unproductive so far.

and my manboobs still hurt from the gymming a day or two ago. Plus today's training, I somehow expect it to be excruciating by tomorrow.

Prof Yasmin Roxxor!

2009-02-12T06:39:00.001-08:00

PBL's today, and again, procrastination reared its fugly head--so much for waking up early to complete it.

Today's lecture was on virology, and although it was rather intriguing the muscle aches really did little to aid me in concentrating in class. That, and of course the uninspiring lecturer who reads from the presentation slides as though we cannot do it ourselves. Admittedly the second one was much better, and the lecturer was somewhat funny in a rather eccentric way--her jokes, while morbid, are strangely amusing.

I question my sense of humor sometimes.

That aside, my life decided to be particularly bitchy today, and by some strange twist of fate I ended up in PBL WITHOUT any notes whatsoever, which under normal circumstances would be somewhat of a death sentence for me; since no notes = nothing to say = looking/sounding idiot. Yours truly, fortunately, has the gift of acting smart really well and suffice to say rose to the occasion. Prior reading helped, too, of course.

Nothing much other than that, though :(

Routinity :D

2009-02-11T08:40:00.000-08:00

If the length of the posts are of any indication, life's pretty much a routine now. What I didn't expect, however was the time it took for it to be so; and this is came after a mere 2 weeks.

No surprises here; classes from 10 to 12 is pretty much an everyday affair--today's was on important bacterias and bacterial reproduction--and the latter nearly lulled me to sleep. Of course being a good student I didn't, as much as I wanted to, though the mention of bacteria penises caught my attention somewhat (inside joke)

Went gymming somewhere in the evening, and I could've swore my arms were deadweight by the end of it, but it wasn't aching after a while, so I guess I'm still game. As for dinner, the only thing memorable about the stall we went was the price. Need I say more?

'Kay. Back to PBL >.<

Of Fungi and Tsusugamushis

2009-02-10T06:16:00.000-08:00

Do excuse the temporary hiatus I took somewhat liberally for the past few days--there weren't much to elaborate on anyway.

So I had to get up earlier today since I had my CSU mercilessly forced onto me in the morning; I quite frankly am not so bothered about the session itself, rather the time of the day. But today, unfortunately, time was not so much of a concern--it was the facilitator.

Suffice to say he absolutely LOVED listening to himself (only 2 out of the 6 present was able to perform the patient history taking with . And he salivates exessively, too--not to mention how he even picks his nose in front of us. And my SP's a dumbass. 'nuff said.

Classes were thankfully much more bearable, fun even. Fungi are cool, I'd give 'em that. So very, very pretty, too. Chlamydia and Rickettsias were well... tolerable, but there'sjust too much names to remember at the moment. PBL's fine; in fact it's very much less aggravating compared to last semester's, and thats fine by me.

But influenza? bah.

Microbiology=pwnage

2009-02-06T08:48:00.000-08:00

Today's lecture was officially the first formal non-intro, non-BS, academically-relevant one of the year (and hence of the semester). Bacterias. Yay.

They're pretty

They cause diseases

They're mighty powerful

They're a pain in the ass to study

They're fundamentally poor critters who just want to survive in this harsh world, just like we do.

So bear with them.

Say no to antibiotics. wtf

CF=pizza=good today, and for that, I'm happy. HOMES was on today, too; and I rather enjoyed the dinner and the company. Oh and American Idol this year's effin' cool. Oh the drama. Me likes drama, yes.

Back to microbiology for now, if you'd excuse me.

As bland as water with tissue paper in it

2009-02-05T07:35:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I think I'm getting used to the waking up part, life's supposed to be better.

But it's not.

Because classes start so late, it's practically afternoon anyway.

Anyway.

Woke up today slightly earlier to get my blood tested--I volunteered myself for this project which involves drinking some juice in which the only thing worse than its smell is its taste--and well, I'm still alive, aren't I? So this particular ...stuff apparently helps in blood coagulation or something, so I was required to give a sample of my blood--and for some reason they had to draw blood from each of my arm.

And for that reason, I went to class a little later--typical. Not that it matters, of course; today's class was all about communication skills i.e. how to deal with unreasonable patients (notice how I refrained from using forbidden adjectives), which if I may add is only mildly entertaining. Oh, there's of course the feigned "I understand this must be very hard on you/come as a shock to you" in tandem with the cued concerned face but hey. Can't go around saying "sucks to be you", although that would be amusing.

After which came PBL, of course but it was irrelevant to me since *glares* I do not have PBL this week.

Otherwise it was pretty much a typical day--bothering friends in the library, submitting reports, having tea in the overpriced fancy-assed cafeteria, chatting and generally abusing the campus' facilities by using it for purposes other than study (and no, I don't do porn in the library sheesh).

Same old, same old.

Wanted: Therapist and Life.

2009-02-04T07:43:00.000-08:00

It would seem that I should have in fact have something better to do than to blog, but as luck would have it, I am still stuck idle. Of course, I could attempt the PBL, but why trouble myself when I have the time?

Class was a hit-and-miss affair today; patient interview was rather boring, but nevertheless it will be important soon, so I guess I can't complain about it. I have no idea, though as to how I am going to remember the questions we are supposed to ask; I can only presume it comes after practice. It would prove to be much more interesting when the real thing starts, though, so I'm looking forward to it. On the other hand, the intro to physical examination was rather exciting--reminded me too much of my experiences SP-ing for seniors (which puts me at a great advantage ahead of a lot of my peers).

I'm practically trembling in anticipation now.

Lunch today reminded me again why I hate a certain bunch of people (not going to mention lest I'm charged for sedition) who prances up a queue with their stupid feigned innocence and flagrantly takes liberty on their turn due to seniority/general idiocy. What pisses me off further is the fact that they do not even AKNOWLEDGE the fact that they skipped the line--and they should really thank the heavens my central axis of control is in place or their dumb-assed faces *smile,smile* would have been pounded in *smash, smash*. And computers are always occupied whenever you need it the most, too *slam, slam* and as a corollary, the convenient power sources would always be occupied on the day you decide to bring your laptop (which, unsurprisingly was rendered a cripple when the battery decided to go kaput and is hence unusable). *seethe, seethe*

Violence and medschool--such an oxymoron, no? But not here; oh no indeed. Your patience would be sorely tested (or rather tested to the point of soreness) every single day.

Anger management is necessary.

Animeslut's not at home today, so I'm alone at home again. sighs.

Another day, another way

2009-02-03T05:37:00.000-08:00

So after a month in a solitary confinement of sorts, I'm finally back to school. Waking up was a chore as usual, but that's only 'cause falling asleep at a decent time has become uncommon--thanks to the holidays.

Breakfast was non-existent since Animeslut couldn't find her student ID card and we naturally had to turn her whole room upside down to look for it. As fate would have it, she left it in Kuantan; so there's halve an hour down the drain. But I don't blame her.

The same would've happened to me anyway.

Since it was the first day, there's the mandatory meeting with the dean and of course a whole solid hour of an overview of this semester by a rather uninspiring lecturer. I almost forgot how cold the lecture hall was over the holidays, and today was nothing short of it.

We (i.e. Koreanslut, Animeslut, Fatslut, Dumbslut and yours truly), being the oafs we are later had to drive all the way back to the old folk's home (in which we did our COP) since we forgot to obtain the signature of the external supervisor. And since they insisted on having lunch before we went back to class for our PBL (yes PBL on the first day wtf rite) we quite unsurprisingly had little time left before PBL and Koreanslut had to hit 120kmph to get back to Uni.

That being said, after all the rush to my PBL room, I found out that PBL for this week's cancelled for my group since the facilitator decided to do a Copperfield on us for the whole damn week. So while everyone busts their ass preparing for the PBL on Thursday (Yeah only 2 days to prepare wtf rite), I am relatively idle atm which isn't such a good thing come to think of it, since an idle medstudent=bad.

On a totally different note, I tripped the house while preparing dinner today so no more using the oven for me. And after downing 3.5 pieces of KFC, I am positively certain I do not want to see another piece of fried chicken for the next week or so.

Uhhh so that's all for today I guess.

(yeah such a lame ending wtf rite)

Return

2009-01-31T22:14:00.000-08:00

I'm finally back home in my apartment--the tables are still in a mess, my room smells like a crypt, my toilet's an ecosystem and I could make snow angels on my floor--but I love it anyway. Missed it, in fact.

Needless to say, cleaning up was a bitch nonetheless, but ah, the things I do for my beloved. Animeslut's not at home, so no help there; the night before was significantly much more quiet than what I'm used to. Thank God net's working, though--I cannot imagine how I'd live without it (like coughcoughthepastmonthcough )

Classes' gonna begin in a day or two, so I'm fairly excited but a little scared at the prospect of having to sit for a major examination this semester. That, or the fat that my COP report (that's Community Oriented Project fyi) is not fully completed yet. Either way, I'm not about to kill meself over this so I'm probably gonna enjoy these last few days as much as I can.

As a sidenote I'm throwing a party tonight in my place for my college mates *joys* so I'm expecting some cool stuff to happen *joys again*

Since I'm in such a good mood here are some pics for the heck of it :D :D

...

okay so photo uploader's not working. Owell too bad then. Maybe some other time.

I'm off to breed those dust bunnies in my home for extra income.

Toodles!

Woman-Nazi

2009-01-22T01:50:00.000-08:00

Supertart, where you're from and how's it going?
I know you, they got no clue 'bout what they're doing
You can play all diva to the other guys out there
But i know what you are, what you are, baby

Look at you, getting more than just a thumb's up
baby you, got all the guys with all their tails tucked
Makin' like a good one but i know 'em when I see 'em
I know what you are, what you are lady

woman-nazi, woman-woman-nazi, you're a woman-nazi
oh, woman-nazi, oh you're a woman-nazi lady
you, you you are, you, you you are
woman-nazi, woman-nazi, woman-nazi
(woman-nazi)

Girl dont try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
girl don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You!)
You got 'em going
(you!)
You got oh so mighty
(you!)
But I won't do it
(You!)
You woman-nazi

Girl dont try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
girl don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(you!)
You say Im crazy?
(You!)
You MADE me crazy
(You!)
But I won't do it
(You!)
You woman-nazi

Mommy-O, you go a-strutting like a harlot
Too bad for you, you just can't find your ever-after
I guess when you have the OCD, makes it hard, it could be messy
who you are, that's just who you are, lady

Lollipop, you must mistake me for your sucker
to think that I, would be your ex-number-whatever
Say it, play it how you want it
But no way, I'm never going back to you, never you, lady

woman-nazi, woman-woman-nazi, you're a woman-nazi
oh, woman-nazi, oh you're a woman-nazi lady
you, you you are, you, you you are
woman-nazi, woman-nazi, woman-nazi
(woman-nazi)

Girl dont try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
girl don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You!)
You got 'em going
(you!)
You got oh so mighty
(you!)
But I won't do it
(You!)
You woman-nazi

Girl dont try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
girl don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(you!)
You say Im crazy?
(You!)
You MADE me crazy
(You!)
But I won't do it
(You!)
You woman-nazi

Maybe if ya got ya some therapy, yeah
(Woman-nazi, woman-nazi, woman-nazi, woman-nazi)
It would all be good and maybe you would be my girl
But I can't 'cause we don't, you!

woman-nazi, woman-woman-nazi, you're a woman-nazi
oh, woman-nazi, oh you're a woman-nazi lady
you, you you are, you, you you are
woman-nazi, woman-nazi, woman-nazi
(woman-nazi)

Girl dont try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
girl don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(You!)
You got 'em going
(you!)
You got oh so mighty
(you!)
But I won't do it
(You!)
You woman-nazi

Girl dont try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are
girl don't try to front
I-I know just-just what you are are-are

(you!)
You say Im crazy?
(You!)
You MADE me crazy
(You!)
But I won't do it
(You!)
You woman-nazi

Boredom: the most overused word in my dictionary.

2009-01-14T00:35:00.000-08:00

If the title was of any indication, you could well expect the next 3 minutes or so (assuming one even reads this) to be occupied with mindless rants and absolutely random b****ings about nothing.

But then again that would be too predictable, eh?

"But life IS predictable!"

"Not unless you live by Murphy's Law"

"..."

(the things I do when I'm bored hmmph)

So. Holidays so far was pretty much comparable to a state one gets into after downing a bottle of tequilla (or three, depending on the person)--you know, the kind when you wake up not knowing what on earth happened the night before. Life is just forgettable like that, I guess. Admittedly I missed medschool a lot, but that's only 'cause life was much more hectic (and much more productive) then.

Activities these days include staying up late, having unnecessarily long late-night drink sessions with my friends and driving round town at ungodly hours to look at trannies. Then again, there's not much to do back at home anyway.

I'm seriously hoping the holidays end soon.

To sum it up...

2008-12-31T10:33:00.000-08:00

So. The past week was a huge blur of activities, though I really should've studied then. But then again, nobody could ever resist celebrating Christmas, what with all the food and company around. Of course there's the perpetual sense of sluggishness whenever an attempt to study is taken—and that is why one should never go home to study. On the plus side, turkeys were in abundance this year and the presents were not too disappointing either, so all's well in the end.

Technically.

So I had my first medschool exam today—after all the hard work (not really), I was actually rather surprised that the questions hardly needed much effort to tackle, but that was only because absolutely NOTHING I have studied so far came out. And that sucks big time. Needless to say a lot of guesswork was done, but thankfully it wasn't that impossible.

And I passed. Which means, I am now offically a second-year medstudent. Whopee.

So there ends the year and my six month's worth of suffering. I must admit while it was tough, I enjoyed it immensely. And for now, it's HOLIDAYS!

I'm Home.

2008-12-19T07:08:00.000-08:00

I'm home, and the grind begins.

Internet is probably going to be a scarce commodity at the moment, but all this is for the greater good of my grades. So wish me luck, people--and I shall, if fate permits it, return unscathed and victorious.

The Fall

2008-12-18T06:56:00.001-08:00

There comes a time when a person realizes just how powerless he is; when he realizes that maybe, just maybe, he isn't so great after all. That he is, after all, still human, mortal. And that is the time when he takes a moment to look inside and reflect upon his past glories and the fact finally hits him that it was all due to chance or lucky stabs which were nothing less than succesful. It would seem that dwelling in the past had warped his perception of reality; he basked in what happened and it went to his head. But when he is defeated, or when the glow of the limelight is taken away he finally knows, that under the cloak of magnificence, under that facade of grim smugness, he is as broken as everyone else, if not more.

But the helplessness can only lead one to so much. It is then when he sees that all is not lost, and that the mountains he scaled in the past means something after all, for great people has the humblest beginings--such is the nature of life. What is lost can be reclaimed, provided enough effort is to be expended.

Suddenly, the future doesn't seem so bleak after all: a better tomorrow is all to one's own perception, ultimately; but more importantly, he learned that yesterdays are but subtle reminders, and todays are to strive for what is to come tomorrow, rain or shine.

(as a sidenote today's patient interview assesment was somewhat meh: i messed up the order of the questions and half of the time i was all "oh sh**." [didn't say it out loud, of course] but i rather enjoyed it. it was fun while it lasted though but now im back to my books)

Patient interviews...

2008-12-17T07:59:00.001-08:00

... are minefields of sorts. First of all, you don't really know what to expect the moment you step into the room-- the person, the atmosphere? Or maybe even the examiner, for that matter, determines how well you're about to set off, and even then the battle's not even close to completion yet.

Next comes the introduction: how do you phrase yourself as to not sound uninformed and yet not bore the recepient with a lengthy, self-indulgent monologue? Ah, the subtleties involved; such balance so easily overturned and ruined by a missed moment. Imagine, how, while attempting to sound professional, a facade of concern and a shred of humanity is to be shown. "How may I address you?" as compared to "what's your name?" makes a huge difference as far as first impressions are concerned. And then there's stating the purpose of having the interview, since many patients do not realize the significance of patient histories. The intention of taking one may as well blow up in the person's (handling the case) face if the right intent is not stated to begin with.

Personal details are very tricky, as there's always the inherent danger of sounding like an uncaring automaton asking questions with a straight face. 2 possibilities may be utilized hence:
1. genuinely care
2. be a good actor
with (apparent) concern being of paramount importance here. Building rapport is equally as, if not more important than the information gained in itself, and that has is to be reflected by the questions you ask and the gesture you use.

Addressing the main ail is of course next, for without an ailment there would be no need for patient history. Having said that, however, some cases known are downright ridiculous: for there may not be a condition, but the patient may just be there because "my pet (insert animal) just died and I'm depressed".

If you ask me, I'd say give the patient a swift kick in the nether region and send the person off.

but of course,..

concern.

So we address the worries and the problem the ail is causing, the onset, etc ad nauseam, all the while trying to be attentive and to slip in a few idle chats to make it more comfortable for the patient. The act of juggling such sentiments are a feat in itself, I must say.

And if it turns out well, the patient (okay, maybe the patient's relative) may just forgive you if you've accidentally killed said patient.

And that is why concern and a silver tongue helps most of the time in this field.

Speaking of which, the patient interview assesment test it tomorrow for me.

Grumbles Aplenty

2008-12-13T07:55:00.000-08:00

Exam's out to kill me, and now another one is out for my head: assignments. Okay, maybe not assignmentS, since I only have one, but this particular bitch here is one hard nut to crack (for me, that is. Feel free to prove me wrong, so long as I get to keep your work). Having said that, the only consolation I could find as of now is the fact that I will not have to submit it anytime soon--but then again with the exams coming time is probably a scarce commodity at the moment.

I blame it on my inability to write short, compact sentences (as proven with my previous posts) and to be concise. But then again, I find it impossible to summarize human genome sequencing techniques in 100 words or so (Again, feel free to prove otherwise). Of course, the imminent danger of having my crippled laptop turn off on me while I'm typing (happened once so far) does little to ease the stress.

While I'm at it, I may as well mention how this medschool is making life all the more difficult by making us do community projects DURINg the semester breaks, further compunding the damage by grading it and having it contribute to the finals. So maybe doing it is not such a hassle, but the paperworks are plain... you know what.

Visited sick Gramps in the hospital today, he seemed to have developed blisters all over his body after taking some chinese medications (the impulse to say "I told you so!" barely stifled). He otherwise looked pretty healthy to me. Of course, I went with mum, and since it was a Saturday, I went shopping with her (bought nothing, unfortunately) and hence wasted another day for studying.

At this rate the only way I could start studying is to shut myself totally from civilization.

But I can't do it. Oh well.

Why Mummy Said NO to Candies for Dinner.

2008-12-09T07:35:00.000-08:00

Apparently studying is not the only thing I could slack in--take this blog, for an example: a daily activity degraded into an occsional chore. In my defense, however, life has been pretty mundane these days, hence the perpetual lack of inspiration and motivation to write (type?) or even say anything remotely witty (or so I hope I have been so far).

Lectures for the past few days were so-so, since much of it was covered in A-levels anyway. Under normal circumstances this translates to more opportunities to catch up with my studies, but of course, such times are best reserved for sleeping or idle chats with a certain housemate.

I shall elaborate no further on my incompetence (or blatant lack of ability thereoff) in managing time--I really ought to start studying now.

Really.

But I can't help blogging. It's just too darned addictive once I've started on my self-indulgent tirade (hey at least I admit it). In fact, since I've been referring to myself too much I shall therefore refer to myself as a third person to sound less, well, annoyingly pompous.

So.

Benben went carolling today which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that he was supposed to be reading on the blob of thing we refer to as the lungs. And not to mention how dinner was not provided, which meant he was pretty hungry; but thank God for snacks anyhow.

That's all for tonite. Well, once benben gets down from this sugar rush.

The Bane of Medschool: Procrastination

2008-12-06T08:25:00.000-08:00

It should be rather apparent now how my weekends tend to be predictable, if not downright dull these days. Gone were the partying, clubbing days now with the exams less than a month away--worse still are the company I've kept; from partying animals they were, nerds they are now with all the studying. And then there is the sinking feeling of guilt I experience on an hourly basis (but not exclusive to me alone) whenever there is nigh a sight of a textbook in front of me.

Needless to say I grabbed every opportunity which involved me not staying at home (to study) OR not studying in the library; and yesterday's HOMES (Cell-group thing) was Godsent (pun intended). Even dinner was atypical of the rice-dish affair--pizza! Food aside, it was great to meet new people so I guess everything was great yesterday night, nevermind the books at home.

Ah, but when conscience kicks in, it kicks you right at the nuts (it just wouldn't cut it if I were to use a medical term for the you-know-what). And so Saturday was dedicated to reclaiming the lost hours--which would've worked out fine if I hadn't waken up in the afternoon and spent hours with my best friend, the DS. Let's not even forget to mention how I, in a moment of insanity, decided to take a swim right after dinner when it was cold outside.

I lasted for about 15 minutes before getting a headache for a wet head in the cold.

Which means studying is postponed to tomorrow, assuming I'll feel better then.

Musings of an Impressed/Vexed Student.

2008-12-04T08:37:00.000-08:00

Embryology is getting onto my nerves but at the same time I cannot help but feel impressed--the human body is never short on surprises. Even at cellular level, the coordination and intricacy is simply fascinating; how cells are able to orientate themselves for implantation or how they differentiate from simple cells into complex organs like the brain. At the same time, I suppose it is annoying as well knowing how humans could be so confusing even before birth.

Ah, speaking of which, I am reminded of the human reproductive organ. Things are just not what it seems in the human genitalia and studying it actually enabled me to realize a parallel between the unmentionables and the difference between the sexes. Take the manhood, for an example: while it seems complicated on the outside, things actually are very simple on the inside--the structure, the physiology. On the other hand, don't be fooled by the apparently simple design of the women's privates: it is, to put it simply, a huge mess to study what with all the dangly bits (pun not intended) and stuff inside which is in another realm to remember. The point is, its very much like how a male and a female's mind work--a male, being a simple being and a female; complicated.

Feh, still that does not detract from the fact that there's just TOO much to learn at too short a time. The fact that more than half of the people in my batch studies for ungodly hours everyday does little to ease the competitive streak in my intake. And then there were the know-it-alls and the know-nothing-at-alls which would get on my nerves ever so occsionally...

All part and parcel of taking this course, I suppose. But all's well at the moment--that is until exams are here.

Lectures are Suddenly Much More Fun When Sex is Involved.

2008-12-01T08:22:00.000-08:00

As much as I would love to gush about what was lectured to me today on the male reproductive system, logic dictates that hardly anyone would give a rat's ass about it anyway, considering my readers are not interested in such matter to begin with. It is, however worth mentioning that the lectures today were nothing short of (crude) unrefined jokes relating to a certain anatomical region which was nevertheless entertaining.

And then there were the grinding sessions in the library which was, as usual, only slightly productive. The DS proved to be a significant distraction, but I'm not complaining. Sessions like that rarely last beyond 2 hours until I either
(a) meddle with my Sharpies and get high on the fumes
(b) play with my DS
(c) check out the hot seniors studying there ("nerds" could turn out to be surprisingly hot)

Of course, that didn't prevent me from knowing the difference between a corpus spongiosum and corpora cavernosa at all--nossir, not at all. In fact, Animeslut did manage to drill into my head the muscles involved in the contraction of the... nevermind.

Of course with the CF's Christmas Celebration about a day away I was unfortunate enough to be involved in the presentations. Suffice to say I am losing my afternoon naps to this event (or the preparations to it for that matter). Drama practice is bad enough, but the last straw came when I found out the actors will have to dance as well at the end; and well that's another item added to my to-do list of the week.

I may as well get some sleep now; tomorrow's definitely going to be a loong day.

The Grind: Grounded

2008-11-30T06:35:00.000-08:00

It goes without saying that with a title like that, one could only expect the worst of the situation; in this case my humble attempts in studying was ended rather unceremoniously by my idle, straying mind. Needless to say my workload is not getting any lighter, but on the brighter side means that this would not be the end of my attempts.

The past few days were typical at best and unremarkably dull at worst; I, for one, however, am thankful for housework since my Saturdays would otherwise be less than productive. Of course there were attempts here and there to study, but little came out of it ultimately. On a completely unrelated matter, though, I have just managed to finish "Eat, Shoots and Leaves" over the weekend and that is probably the greatest accomplishment for this particular lazybum.

I am looking forward to Monday: Reproductive System, here I come!

The Grind : Day 5

2008-11-27T08:52:00.000-08:00

The Grind, as the title announces like the obnoxiously bratty show-off reminiscent of the initiator (i.e. yours truly) would soon enough degrade into The Broomstick who THOUGHT it could. Being put simply, the initial hoo-ha is begining to fizz into oblivion, since I am hardly putting in any effort anymore (that being said while FB-ing and holding a book NOT remotely related to medicine currently, said medical books lay open 3' away)

But then again who said medschool would entail easy reading and light schedules? (well for this particular medschool the schedule's light, but that's not the point). So sure, judge me for not living up to expectations set by the title, but I'm certainly not about to kill myself by brain-overload. Not during this semester, at least--which brings to mind the question of who or what exactly possesed me to even think of the title to begin with.

What, you want to know what happened today?

Mandatory lectures on the endocrine system, of course; which really, is a blatant waste of time, seeing as to how the very same contents could be read in less than half the time in the textbooks (see I DO read ahead sometimes). And then there was the SP-ing session which although proved to be (slightly) helpful was a pain. Just imagine being percussed (i.e. tapped) all over the chest/stomack area by 6 or so girls who have no inkling of their strength (and kneaded, pressed, etc) and you roughly have an idea of what these sessions are all about.

Then came studying, of which effort was lukewarm at best--followed by the boring weekly MMS session.

And then it's routine all over again, all up to blogging.

It's getting late now, I probably oughta be sleeping now.

The Grind: Day 3 & 4

2008-11-26T07:50:00.000-08:00

I am begining to question if I could pull out this grind if I'm going to lose my sleep in the meantime.

So yesterday I had PBL again--but this time I pretty much kept quiet since I was trying hard to remain awake while pulling out my trademark mildly-interested-slightly-apathetic look I perfected all in the name of looking cool/smarter than everyone else (looks may not be everything, but they are many things in my book).

Of course, studying in the wake of Facebook and MSN 3 feet away was simply impossible--and there went evening studies.

Woke up in the middle of the night due to GI irritation, and that didn't stop at once--I was forced to do so at 2-hour intervals to address the particular problem. Needless to say it was literally a drag to wake up this morning.

Aside from the obligatory classes, for some cruel reason the campus admins thought that for some twisted reason having my BS Patient Interview (practice) session today would be a mighty fine idea.

I thought I did pretty well, of course discounting the fact that I mistakenly "passed judgement" ("...if you DO have cancer") on a patient--prior to diagnosis.
It was fun nonetheless.

And then there was the CF-practice thing again--it seems like it'll never end.

Fortunately, some minute grinding was fitted in somewhere during the lulls.

Right now I oughta sleep or I'll die all over again tomorrow.

The Grind: Day 2

2008-11-24T06:41:00.000-08:00

The lecture today was simply brain-draining for the simpleton like me, so much so I HAD to take up the offer of being an SP during the secind lecture to escape it. The theory here is simple: to avoid overloading my brain with BS (pun intended if you happen to know what BS is in my language) I simply chose to not attend the class for that particular subject.

I learn more SP-ing and BS-ing anyway.

The plan for grinding today was thwarted by the numerous meeting I got myself into for being overambitious, but I am certainly not complaining about it since it provides the much-needed distraction from studies.

And after all the meetings and practices, I was pretty much exhausted by the end of the day (and that only means being back at home). Coupled with the fact that the chapter for today is pretty much impossible to complete without a clear mind, the grinding purpose for the day was pretty much defeated. Not without much effort, mind--it just seemed that rational thoughts have abandoned me.

And for now, sleep beckons my poor, broken, frail body burdened with the weight of the medschool world.

The Grind: Day 1

2008-11-23T06:46:00.000-08:00

Alas, only 4 more weeks to go before the dreaded exams, and the grind has already started. Today would be the propagator--and God knows how much I needed to start ASAP, considering how far I'm left behind while my studyload steadily gets heavier.

Woke up today at 10 in the morning(which would be highly unusal on any given normal Sunday) with the sole intention of getting started with my much delayed studies. Well, that was the plan, at least. The more appropriately accurate time would be about an hour or so later, since using the snooze function of my cellphone is simply to hard to resist.

And factoring in the FB-time and baths and lunch, it was well noon before I actually started. Two hours later.

The process in itself is spaced rather liberally in between with trips to the loo, FB-ing and of course the godsent DS. Now, lest I am dismissed as not being serious with this resolution, allow me to say that I did study a significant portion of a chapter (the whole chapter, to be exact) to at least have the right to brag I have indeed put it effort for this noble cause of NOT failing in my first test. That, and a few exercises on that chapter, too.

Lunch and dinner was pretty insipid at the least, and I wasn't even filled to satiety--but then again I guess it's my fault for skipping church today. (For the record I am provided with free dinner in church with theoratically infinite refills).
Not to mention that guilty pit-feeling in the stomach for abandoning my religious obligations for something as measly as studies.

Feh, studies. Trust me, after 4 hours or so on the GI tract, you'll never look at the stomach the same way anymore.

And this is said before the cadavering.

Well, off to another hour of grinding. (maybe)

Sharpies are cute and fishballs are round.

2008-11-21T09:03:00.000-08:00

Ever so occasionally the schedule decides to be merciful to the already sleep-deprived body of mine, and today was fortunately one of those days where I am allowed to sleep in slightly later than usual due to the absence of the first class of the day.

The library was particularly empty today, which was not really good news, seeing as to how slight noises would send a thousand glares at my way (figuratively, of course) since it's simply easier to detect slight disturbances with the lack of people.

Bah, random chatter again.

Studied for probably about a minute or so before I Facebooked a little, and before I knew it it was time for CF, so the textbooks remain relatively untouched. It was a few hours before I returned to retrieve the aforementioned books, and even so it was again left at home as I went grocery-shopping for the steamboat-party later.

I even got myself a new set of Sharpies! :D

Dinner was, however much more interesting what with last minute cancellations and invites for the steamboat party. Not exactly steamboat as much as steampot, actually, since we used ricecookers instead of the traditional steamboat. But ah, I guess that's the life of students everywhere.

And I would never want to see another fishball in my life again.

Any other meatballs would be fine otherwise, however.

We just had too many fishballs in one sitting.
And come to think of it, I did not have the chance to sit much throughout the party, preparing the broth and all.

And that explains the achy legs and strong inclination to fall asleep right about now.

I wouldn't have had it any other way, however.

Monday Musings

2008-11-17T07:58:00.000-08:00

Well things have been going on really slowly these days, what with the examinations and all in less than 2 months and my studyload steadily increasing on a daily basis. Point is, its supposed to be hectic but I seem to be overlooking that fact a wee bit--but then again I'm just probably too used to the partying over the past few weeks and that's getting to my head.

Don't we all just love rambling without any sense of direction?

Even the lectures these days are somewhat uninspiring or plain dull. And if i may add, very poorly (and stupidly) arranged as well--take, for an example, last Thursday and Friday: Thursday's lectures were important but the admins chose to stuff 2 lectures in a timeframe of an hour. The lecturers being vague and plain incomprehensible did not ease the situation at all. And then came Friday, with 2 PPD lectures (a point I cannot stress enough) of which NOBODY (with the exception of kiasu nerds or people with too much time on their hands) ever bother to attend anyway.

Why are we given half an hour for an important lecture on anatomy but one whole day for something that is not even relevant at the least is beyond me.

On a more positive note though, I met my family over the weekend and well, had lunch and did some family-ish stuff (of course assuming that what my family does together is typically applicable to all families).

And they're flying off to Bandung!
(for the uninitiated it means shopping for more clothes for yours truly, and byebye to instances where I see another dude having on the exact same shirt as I am--and trust me it happens more often than you think in me medschool).
"Oh hello there, nice uh, shirt ya have there".

I'm expecting the clothes when they touchdown on Wednesday; and I'm already convulsing in anticipation.

PBL's tomorrow, and I just can't wait for another round of member-bashing.

toodles for now.

I'm Bored! (sung to the tune of "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz)

2008-11-12T04:57:00.000-08:00

When i'm done done with my work I felt it
I tried to be nerd
but it's so lame that I ditched it
I fell right off my bed
and now i'm a spastic

before assignments are done i'll be playing like a madman
nothing's gonna stop me but some sleep and my DS
(but) I reckon it's again my turn
to use the bathroom

I won't hesitate no more
no more, my work can wait
but I'm bored!

well open up my books and I'm asleep
but open up my mags and damn, I'm free
look into my notes and I'll find
crap crap crap crap
listen to my iPod and some thrashy music
I'm just one big pile of mess
and it's my godforsaken right to have
fun fun fun fun fun

So, I won't hesitate no more
no more, my work can wait I'm sure
there's no need to do those crap my time is short
this is the fact
it's crap!

I've been spending way too long checking my face in the mirror
and squatting over books I'll never read altogether
The dust fogged up the glass
and so I wiped it a bit and spat
I guess what I'd be saying is I need to do some cleaning
and rid myself of thrash and maybe do a lil' studying
that's what I ought to do
but im just to lazy

But I won't hesitate no more
no more my work can wait
I'm bored!

So please don't, please don't, please don't
there's no need to do those crap
cause my time is short
this , this, this is the truth
I'm bored!

disclaimer: this is in no way a mockery of the original, in fact I love the song to bits. In any case the song does not entirely represent me all the way, but it does apply on occasions. this is copyrighted!

Summarizing skills DO come in handy in medshool!

2008-11-10T06:12:00.001-08:00

Been a crazy past few days, life. Got an MPV rolling over my feet and the electricity supply cut all on the same day, and at the same time arrived too early for classes (that, too can be bad).

Friday was meh as usual, save for the fact that I volunteered myself to help out at the church HQs, and now I truly dread sticking stamps to envelopes after doing so for about a thousand times.

Saturday was Koreanslut's birthday--had a great dinner that reminded me somehow of char koay teow--minus the annoying koay teow, of course. And beansprouts. And cockles. You get the idea. But it was good; and ultimately that was all that mattered. I couldn't, however, for the love of me, remember the name of the particular dish/meal, except that it was on this huge hotplate. Karaoke was next on the programme, and it was fun, though it didn't end there.

And for the third consecutive week, we drank again.

I was (thankfully) much less hung-over for church, but since it was a morning service and I attended an award ceremony right after that I was pretty much in a comatose state by the time I hit home. Figuratively, of course. God knows how this world would survive without me.

*ahem*

Which leads us to today. Came into class too early again today, but otherwise everything was pretty smooth-sailing; I even got to present for my Case Study presentation my team and I worked our asses off for.

Went for lunch (in an insanely overpriced restaurant) and a movie in MV right after class, and I met up with Darren and Michelle thereafter (childhood friends from across the seas)--I must say they do look so much different from the last time I saw them. Did a little shopping and dinnering for a while, and that was about it.

And that's almost a week crammed in a single post. Congratulate me.

2008-11-07T09:04:00.000-08:00

computers's being a bitch. cant post until im certain its not gonna go dead on me anytime. D: sorry, dear bloggie.

Because I keep losing my posts.

2008-11-04T07:27:00.001-08:00

On very rare occasions (where my ego takes a dip) I find myself questioning my decision of taking medicine as my future career line. I cannot be sure of the reason why I chose this path anymore and I certainly don't see myself putting in enough effort to justify being put where I am now.

Seeing as to how my classmates study everyday.

But then again, I'm probably just bored with the monotony of the lecture-lunch-sleep routine everyday. I probably need to get laid or something.

Anyway.

Monday was fairly normal, save for the fact that my laptop went dead while I was using it, taking with it my precious blogpost which (I must add) was not saved by blogspot.com because the world hates me. To further compound the damage, PBL was on the next day and there were still research to be done.

Did I mention the laptop wouldn't restart until I removed the batteries and plugged in the adaptor as well? So picture this: an unportable laptop. Which means my laptop is now a cripple. A retard. Nevermind.

That was yesterday. (my laptop is still a disabled, by the way). My PBL was today, but since the facilitator had to invigilate for an examination it was postponed for 2 hours, therefore I had to miss lunch with teamslut. This time around the group was more relaxed and interacted better, but I still cannot help feeling that some members were being idiots as usual by giving answers that were totally off-topic to the questions posed.

And I went out with Animeslut and the HOMES members with the church's transport minister for supper. Had loads of fun--at least it was better than rotting at home doing nothing.

Classes are cancelled for tomorrow, leaving only the optional PPD lecture on time management. I might be going for it, but only for the First Aid Club's welcoming party and my Case Study group meeting. Until then, I shall continue to nurse my ailing laptop, for without it I shall convulse and die.

Longest. Post. Evah!

2008-10-31T09:22:00.000-07:00

So let's start, shall we? Friday, which incidentally was my birthday, started fairly typical enough--complete with boring lectures and all. The only saving grace was the absence of a second lecture, which nevertheless pleased me a lot, not that attendance was compulsory in the first place.

So off we went to Bangsar for some shopping at a designer good's sale. I must say it was one of the worst sales I've ever been to--it was really packed and messy; and clothes (designer's,mind) were treated like those we see in nightmarkets. I unfortunately could not find any nice clothes that fit or any fitting clothes that is nice.

I hate being constitutionally-challenged.

And we got told off by a pissy sales assistant for mistreating some of the merchandises (Dumbslut was actually lying down on a pile of clothes we heaped on the ground. Again, designer's.).

Animeslut, on the other hand was publicly tongue-lashed by a pissy woman standing ahead of her for accidentaly queue-jumping, with her only reason being "it is unfair to the man behind you".

The man, apparently couldn't have cared less anyway.

Woman,
1. Public lectures are reserved for mothers-son/daughter only. To strangers, NOT COOL. Even if you must, it could well be done with a little more finesse and flair.
2.Raising your voice in public shows just how civilized you are, so don't even talk about being fair when you can't even respect another's dignity.
3. You really don't give a rat's ass about the person behind you, so let's stop all pretense as though you do, hmm?
4.Deal with it if you can't find clothes that fit. Don't take it out on literally smaller girls.

And yes, I was miffed because I didn't do anything to even support Animeslut. But it's over now, all's cool, so yeah.

We had lunch at Marmalade's very much later after all the drama, and I enjoyed it immensely, though it was a tad pricey for students with wallets of my calibre. Koreanslut joined us later (he had English class before that) and became the subject of our jibes when he ordered a strawberry milkshake. (inside joke about him being overtly-metro)

Headed to Toys'R'Us right after that to shop for Halloween outfits--I got myself a Jason-inspired half-mask and a bloodied knife to match while Animeslut went on to get a pair of lighted-up horns and a wand for reasons unknown. We headed home immediately after that to restock on our sleep--it was bound to be a long day.

Teamslut was supposed to meet up in my apartment at 6 to prepare and leave for KL for dinner, but due to Dumbslut and Fatslut's unnaturally long preparations, dinner was reduced to take-away from the stores downstairs (which we do almost everyday, so that was hardly anything to be excited about.)

Preparations was fun, however--I went as a serial murderer.

Deliberated for awhile as to which club to go to, but was finally limited to Maison when all the other clubs only allowed entry to people 21 years old and above, which sucks. Clubbing, as usual was fun, but not without the dramas as usual. To protect the privacy of the people involved, I shall (regretfully) abstain from elaborating on it.

After all the clubbing, in which strangely enough left none of us wasted as we typically would, we went to a mamak's at the area for a drink. It was 4am.

By the time we actually reached home, it was close to 5am, and yet the others still wanted to drink (we actually planned an alcohol after-party, but the drama pretty much killed the mood.). I wasn't up for it because I was simply put too tired (and too traumatised from the previous drinking incident) to join them.

I was told they had a blast while I slept, but I was pretty much having a blast myself in dreamland and I was pretty sure I had my share of fun for my birthday. Sleep is simply too precious to waste.

I woke up on a Saturday afternoon, and teamslut was mostly awake then as well, so we went out for brunch in Sri Petaling and parted after the meal to continue crashing at home.

I woke up at 5 in the evening to dress up for an organ recital one of my other friend is bringing me to. He was actually cool enough to get me a FCUK scarf (which I doubt I'll use anytime soon, considering the weather) and pay for my dinner as a late birthday gift of sorts. The organist was amazing, and he's 77! The highlight was definitely him playing "Flight of the Bumblebee" with his feet on the paddle of the organ, which I believe not many could do at his age.

Aside from that, the Saturday pretty much went on as usual.

And so was the Sunday, as a matter of fact. Poor Animeslut as usual had to stay at home alone as I attended church. Short day, otherwise.

Lectures tomorrow. yay.

Too busy (sorta)

2008-10-30T09:50:00.000-07:00

too lazy to post today. some other day soon, maybe :D

Another missed post.

2008-10-29T02:03:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I missed yesterday's post--but I had a perfectly valid reason!

I knew something was wrong the moment I woke up--head was throbbing, nose blocked; yeah, classic symptoms of the flu. I still dragged myself to Uni, though only to find the lecturer NOT present.

That genius moved the lecture venue without informing us beforehand. Thank God the second lecture was much more bearable, bearing in mind my nose was a running waterpipe and my head was throbbing.

PBL did not help either--the group was quiet as usual, and the facilitator expected a lot from us, which was not such a bad thing if my brains were in working condition to begin with. PBLs are always stressful.

Let's assume my day ended there--I spent most of the time sleeping, if not killing the forests by using too much tissues.

Thankfully I felt much better this morning-- the first lecture was conducted by 2 of my favourite lecturers, so it wasn't that bad. The second lecture, however absolutely marked off "cardiologist" from the list of my possible future specializations--but then again the lecturer wasn't THAT good to begin with, so I guess that's that.

Everything else was as usual.

I need a change of pace, stat.

A day off.

2008-10-27T07:17:00.000-07:00

Notice how I skipped yesterday's post--it was simply because everything was pretty much the same routine on a Sunday: sleep, church, back, sleep. The only difference this week was the fact that Monday was not such a drag, 'cause it's a holiday.

Happy Deepavali (sorta).

Woke up (as always on a holiday) at 12pm to a phonecall from my mum; apparently one of my grandaunts have moved to the other plane. Truth to be told, I was rather ignorant of her condition, my sentiments before receiving the news somewhat bordering on apathy. And contrary to popular belief that I have not a shred of humanity in me, I DID feel somewhat sad, but I guess there is nothing I could do anyway since I was stuck (still am) in my apartment. So maybe I hardly spent time with her, but I could recall times when I did rather vaguely--it still is better than nothing at all.

Aside from the news, nothing much worth mentioning happened today. As much as I would love to go into details, I am pretty convinced that nobody would be interested in stories of me re-arranging the furnitures in my room or how long I spent studying today.

Even Animeslut was locked up in her room today, God knows what for. (cue "Lemon Tree" playing in the background)

Dinner was only slightly less uneventful; Animeslut and I decided to have ours in Sri Petaling and I brought her to a restaurant (Capri Cuisine) that I have been eyeing for awhile. The restaurant turned out to be a place she once came with her Weird Lolita Friends (WLFs)--for the uninitiated, Animeslut has the tendency to dress in frilly, lacy costumes a la lolita occasionally when she hangs aound her WLFs.

What's more, she even called them over to have dinner with us!

Thank God they were dressed normally this time around. The dinner was awesome as well, though a tad pricey in my opinion for such small portions.

Went grocery shopping immediately after that, and I stocked up on foodstuff; my instant noodle stock was depleted anyway. It was when I got home that I discovered I overstocked on shallots, which means more wastage.

Note to self: get a shopping list the next time.

Emo-drunk.

2008-10-26T00:42:00.001-07:00

Slept at 4 am, woke up at 9.

brunch with friends, didn't have to pay. Happy.

Early birthday surprise, figured out a week ago.

(Dead tired)

1Utama, met aunt.

Hates department stores. Tired.

Free dinner. Happy.

Home, teamslut--pubbing.

3shot tequilla. Drunk.

Puked, emo-drunk: apologizes non-stop.

Teamslut was helpful, Queenslut nay.

Slept at 6am.

Totally missed out on blogging.

Memory Lapses: a study in the life of B_CJT.

2008-10-24T03:04:00.000-07:00

I am begining to think that my memory is failing these days--take yesterday, for an example. I was supposed to hand my papers in for the loan I was applying for to get into medschool but I slept over it instead. Fortunately I managed to hand it in today, or else I would be mightily screwed; to be exact screwed by RM150,000.

And that was not all.

I was on my way for lab sessions (typical of me, I was late) when I realized my lab session was on the day before. I have, for some accursed reason, slept through the whole thing at home.

And then there's the fact that I've absolutely forgotten about updating my blog at night yesterday, a seriously unforgivable act if you ask me--especially since I wasn't even busy last night.

Well today was fortunately less riddled with lapses of memory on my part. I did not miss any classes, as boring as they may be but the lecturer certainly did for one class--he was apparently stuck in a traffic jam; meaning to say a whole hour of (possible) sleep wasted. By the time the second lecturer came in, half the class already left to pursue less trivial matters and even less actually concentrated on it. The topic of "Attitude and Health Education" never appealed to many people anyway, including me. I spared a few glancing moments vaguely peering over my DS/artblock to look at the lecture slides, but acheived nothing aside from a semi-completed artwork and a few completed stages in my game.

The papers I missed passing up on the day before was rushed as soon as the lectures were over to the officers and this time around I thankfully did NOT miss out on any documents, 'cause we all know having to fork out a 150grand more for medschool fees ain't cool. I immediately rushed back after submitting the bucnh of papers to catch a badly-needed nap (which is strange, seeing how I slept relatively earlier than usual). Animeslut, having clubbed the night before was naturally KOed as well. (she returned at 4 am).

We later returned to Uni to meet up with our "buddies", seniors assigned to help out the juniors in any manner deemed fit. My buddy was rather plain-looking (his face could very well be a sack of punched potatoes), but he looked like someone I could trust nonetheless and for that I am glad. I could add that he certainly looks like someone who could provide good tutoring, but that's me judging a Louis Vuitton by its price.

Dinner was McD's with my sorta-cell group from ACTS. It was a great distraction for the night and I enjoyed their company as usual. Went for supper later with them as well before coming back to blog.

Tomorrow's gonna be great. I'm trying to stay positive.

Sleep Slip

2008-10-22T08:47:00.001-07:00

I deem it apt to describe events preceding the previous post, since we stayed up well to 4a.m. doing crazy things. For some weird reason, Animeslut and not-so-exclusive-anymore housemate decided that my room would serve to be a better place to hang out at, and so they did.

The other housemate we refer to as SanSan was surfing the net in my room looking for clubs to celebrate Halloween's (and my *ahembirthday*) day while Animeslut thought that chatting with a certain senior on msn thru my laptop is fun.

Ultimately SanSan got frustrated looking for one and Animeslut chatted up to 4a.m while I tried keeping my eyes open the whole time.

Three hours or so of sleep did little to help me concentrate in class but I somehow managed to do just that--my notes on Human Blood Grouping was better than the mess I took down a few days ago. The second lecture on Lymphatics were a little testing to my nerves and ability to stay awake, but I think it went pretty well.

Caught up with my lost sleep immediately after lunch. What I initially planned as a short nap turned into a 4-hour snooze fest thanks to the events last night.

Pranced around for God knows how long up to dinnertime and to midnight, where we agreed on mamak--I managed to drag the supersenior Kiryu along with us for the company and stayed up to 3am there.

If this sleeping pattern continues for the rest of the week I don't really think I'm gonna be alive at the end of it.

A post cut short by monotony.

2008-10-21T06:48:00.000-07:00

Mornings can be so typical, especially for me--stuff was happening again this morning, you know, of the typical kind except the fact that we actually arrived on time for the lecture.

Then he started on Haemopoiesis, which simply put meant blood formation. For something that was only covered in 3 pages in our textbooks, 50+ slides for an hour's worth of lecture was simply overkill, even with my ability to take down notes (relatively) quickly.(I swear I'm not boasting, I think I am the only one in my batch to NOT print out the notes, instead taking them down in class in situ)

Really, he could have shortened the lecture to half (or more) and saved me a whole lot of ink. I gave up taking notes about three-quarters into the first lecture anyway.

I must say, I wasn't even remotely prepared for what was about to hit me on the second lecture. I literally dropped my pen and shut my notebook (and mind) after filling up half the page of my notes on Hemostasis, mainly because I couldn't understand what on earth the lecturer was blabbing about--and I wasn't the only one with the sentiment, too! Even oldslut with her monstrous focus exclaimed after class "that was the best lecture EVER. I couldn't even understand what he was talking about at all".

The lecture was 60 slides long.

The 1000+ paged textbook reserved only 3~5 pages for that partiular topic on clotting.

You do the math.

On the plus side, I managed to complete a sketch and a half in class after I burned out during the second lecture. I guess it wasn't so unproductive after all.

Afternoon nap as usual, but I woke up a little earlier to start on my reading since the lectures were being a pain in the you-know-where. Didn't complete much, save for summarizing the whole first lecture in 2 pages of notes. As usual, it rained like a bitch so we had to trek thru the rain to get dinner--I got pretty miffed at myy dinner, simply because I specifically asked for an extra-spicy char kuey teow, bu instead got a semi-spicy kuey teow-noodle...thing. I'm a purist by nature, and naturally I found the combination doing a gross injustice to the fact that I paid for it.

I can be such a diva at times, but hey, I'm a smart consumer. I deserve my rights.

I'm actually begining to hate Mondays now.

2008-10-19T22:35:00.000-07:00

"I WANNA BE A SLUT!"--Dumbslut, on Halloween costumes (in the cafeteria)

I really cannot understand why despite having hours upon hours of sleep, I still find myself unable to wake up in the morning on my own accord (i.e. wake up on time). Since I am already 19 I highly doubt I am still at a growing phase, though I wouldn't mind another inch or five.

Today was no exception.

As usual, we arrived in class slightly later--the class today was on Components of blood and its functions. Pretty much a standard fare in my opinion, it was a refresher course for anyone who took A-levels or STPM either way.

What was boring was the lecture--what wasn't, however was the lecturer. So he might not be the best speaker around, but his pronunciation. Take, for an example the word lobe. Any normal human would pronounce it as low-b(uh) but he would pronounce it as low-beh so it was pretty funny. Try pronouncing calcium: cal-shee-uhm--he made one of the most ordinary element sound so exotic, I wanted it.

Other than that I pretty much died by the first half of the second lecture.

Lunch at the cafeteria as usual, we discussed about food most of the time until we started on drinking, and then partying, and then halloween parties. The chat was immediately terminated when Dumbslut shouted really excitedly (and loudly. The friends I have.) "I wanna be a slut! Naturally, that attracted a whole lot of attention to our lunchtable and so we had to leave while covering our asses.

I presume the evening events would be the same as usual?

Yeah so I'm screwing up the timeline a little, so what?

2008-10-19T22:10:00.000-07:00

Alright, so I missed a post for Sunday--but I was really tired yesterday and my weekend routine was rather effed up due to a certain housemate. To make it clearer, I was just about to sleep after posting the previous entry to my blog when Animeslut, who was out buzzed me and simply said "hey we're going out clubbing so get dressed 'cuz we're coming back to pick you up now".

Now I'm not really a huge fan of clubs, but since it WAS a Saturday night I figured there would be no harm going out (it was about 12am when we left). We (Queenslut, Dumbslut, Animeslut and I) arrived at this rather obscure club and paid a rather heavy sum of cash (RM35/person+drinks) in my opinion for the cover charges, keeping in mind that the clubs we go to usually don't charge us 'cuz we're THAT cool.

I was just about to comment on how curiously faggy the patrons were to my groupies when Animeslut exclaimed quite nonchalantly "oh by the way, this is a gayclub." and I went "oh. that explains a lot."

I wouldn't say I didn't enjoy the experience, 'cause well I had lots of fun. I find it somehow flattering to have people actually checking me out, and the girls were happy as well since nobody would harass them here so they were free to dance. Queenslut, however had to be protected constantly by the girls cuz apparently teh fags dig him. I found it pretty hilarious but I felt sorta inferior 'cause no one harassed me (which comes to show just how unattractive I am).

Due to the homophobic nature of some of my readers I shall keep further descriptions to myself.

Had mamak a little while after we were done with some people we met in the club, who were surprisingly nice and even offered to take the tab. They even knew my cousin, so that was quite nice as well.

And by the time we arrived home, it was alredy 5.30am--even so by the time I actually started sleeping the sky was actually getting bright! Thank God church was in the evening.

Waking up on a Saturday is like trying to cut your legs off with a spoon. Today i did it with a plastic spoon.

2008-10-18T07:20:00.000-07:00

The thing I love about Saturdays is the fact that I have the whole day to myself to do whatever I want, especially to restock on the week's worth of lost sleep. More so today, actually, since I was practically out of my apartment for about 14 hours or so. (staying awake for that duration is nearly unheard of usually).

Naturally I would abuse my Saturdays by staying up really late at night (or early in the morning?) surfing the net or doing something else.

I was woken up by a message sent to me by a senior in my CF (Christian Fellowship) regarding a toilet-cleaning activity I volunteered for about a week ago at 9 am later--I received the message at 5 am. Now, at 5am with severe sleep deprivation, the last thing I'd want is to be reminded that I still have work to be done but that was what happened today. At 7+am or so I forced my body to separate from the bed and Facebooked for awhile before moving to my Uni for the dreaded programme.

So the whole bunch of us idiots who turned out were separated into groups, each taking a different floor of the campus and cleaning every toilet on the floor as a sign of servanthood. I must admit I was rather repulsed at first at the prospect, but it turned out rather fun--after the 2nd toilet or so I'd like to believe we were getting good at the job, even. (my favorite tool was the wiper for the glass--the one with the thin rubber edge to wipe smooth surfaces)

I also made a surprising discovery today--the women's is much dirtier than men's in this particular area, which is strange if we were to go by the stereotype that males are sloppier and hence have dirtier toilets.

I am also confused as to why would anyone need to use so much tissue and not use the dustbins to dispose of them, instead deciding that the floor would serve the purpose much more effectively. You'd think that healthcare workers would be more aware of the hazards it poses (to the eye, especially). I don't even want to know what they did with it before chucking it on the floor.

I really admire those cleaning ladies.

Went back home to have a long shower and nap--precious Saturdays are not meant to be wasted by staying awake, after all. Before I crashed, however, I realized there were still clothes to be washed--one huge pile to be exact, so I had to keep myself awake for about an hour or so while my clothes go for a spin. My head was doing the same thing as well, come to think of it.

Had a long nap after that,which was only about 2hours as a matter of fact. Animeslut went out to watch a stand-up comedian (she could've just watched Dumbslut for free) in Bangsar while I am left alone at home again. Guess its nasi lemak and AIR topic again for me this weekend.

I love Saturdays, but they seem to hate me.

Long day out!

2008-10-17T09:09:00.000-07:00

Stress was our first topic of lecture for today, but Animeslut and I were rather indifferent today prior to going to class today even though we were late as usual, simply because it is a BS lecture. The lecturer was okay-good but I hardly concentrated on her, instead focusing mostly on my sketchbook (unusual activities of students apathetic to BS lectures include sleeping, chatting, or in my case daydreaming or sketching). So maybe we (okay, I) find it useless--but can anyone blame us (me) if they are something that have been repeated ad nauseam in almost all motivational talks?

When the lecture ended, Teamslut (yours truly included) immediately went home for a change of outfit and left for THE Pavillion--skipping, of course the optional talk on stress management ('cause were too stressed already by the first lecture).

Of course, me, being the lowly kid who never shopped at designer boutiques had convulsing fits of ecstasy everytime we stopped at one. (I didn't show it outwardly, of course). While we only browsed through designer goods ('cause we all know we cannot afford those, save for Queenslut), the girls thought that it would be a great idea to browse for a good 2 hours respectively at Topshop and Forever 21--I swear if i hear another squeal of "Ooh that's so cute/cool/pretty" my eardrums would rupture.

I did, however eye a vest in Topshop that actually fits me, and considering my size is a miracle in itself. What prevented me from getting the size-34 black vest was the price and the deflated condition of my wallet. For those interested in getting me the item--be it for my birthday or christmas present (it never hurts to dream) I believe it costs less than RM190.

Had lunch at approximately 3pm at the foodcourt before going to Starhill Gallery to browse for Queenslut's mother's birthday present. Though he had the predisposition (and means!), he ended up not getting anything anyway.

Went home, but went out again almost immediately thereafeter to meet my churchmembers for a dinner in Sri Petaling--I must say, I surprisingly enjoyed myself a lot during dinnertime. The meals were excellent as well--prawns, pork-ribs, fish, everything! Too bad I couldn't remember the name of the restaurant, though, but that's the problem with having chinese names for restaurants: It's just so hard to remember them!

We moved on our little party of sorts to another place later with really great desserts for well, desserts. Celebrated a friend's belated birthday and chatted for a long, long time while going all nerdy by speaking in medical terms. Suffice to say by the end of today I was happy but so friggin' tired I think I am going to spend the whole of tomorrow sleeping.

Uh well God I made a mistake yesterday... could you direct the meteorite to the construction site next to my medschool please?

2008-10-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

Well at least they saved me a seat in the lecture hall today--though of course, Animeslut and I came in a little later as usual. I must say, the lecture hall today was particularly cold; but then again I AM slightly sick so it's no surprise I am feeling so. No, I am not trying to gain sympathy here, though of course if it's offered I'll gladly oblige.

So the first lecture was about joints--again by the same lecturer. Okay, so maybe the lecture wasn't anything to chout about--it's almost the same as it is everyday but since this is the last lecture from this particular lecturer for a long time, I'm giving him the credit. Joints are well, joints. As to why anyone would want to dedicate their lives studying the area where two bones join together is beyond me. (but for the record, there's more than just an empty space. there's the synovial fluid, supporting ligaments, etc)

Surprisingly, I enjoyed BS today--the lecturer was superb and I never expected any less of him, as he managed to turn something as mundane as motivation into an interesting class. Of course, the videos were quite a good distraction as well.

I still don't see the significance of Behavioural Science, however.

Lunch today was slightly different, though; instead of having it with the sluts, I had it with Esther and Jonny in a restaurant in Sri Petaling called "Familiar Faces". Strange name, yes, but the food there was definitely better than the tasteless...things we have in the cafeteria. Had an interesting discussion about certain political issues that cannot be mentioned lest I am detained by certain authorities.

Attended the MMS (medical museum sessions) later in the afternoon and it was somewhat fun while it lasted. Today's session was all on bones and in boredom I decided that playing puzzle with the model human brain (its detachable) and chatting with my new buddy Bob the skeleton would be more productive than identifying the carpals and the tarsals.

Dinner was slightly earlier than usual today, too. Had some fried rice which totally obliterated any remnant of a voice I have since this morning (my voice was already croaky this morning but by that time it was practically nonexistent.). The rest of the night was spent in silence on my part, which I guess wasn't so bad as I had to start on my assignment. (I was supposed to start on it many weeks ago.). My vocabulary has apparently decided to leave with my voice, and writing was almost hell.

Otherwise nothing much happened tonight--I'm tired. G'nite.

Dear God, I pray a meteorite strikes my medschool so I can get some cadavers.

2008-10-15T07:47:00.000-07:00

I woke up feeling like I could die this morning (hardly surprising), but for an altogether reason: I was actually feeling sick physically and actually considered skipping lectures for today. Conscience, however, made me drag that near-lifeless body of mine outta bed, because knowing the fact that medschool ain't cheap, I sure wasn't about to miss any class.

I did, unfortunately arrive 3 slides into the lecture.

So today's lecture was about "Bones and cartillage", again by the same lecturer I have been having throughout the whole week; not that I'm complaining, mind. So we started of with the cartilage--you know, those white stuff we chew on when we go to KFC or have our Beggar's Chicken. Very pretty cells.

Second lecture was a continuation of the first, but I was rather annoyed at how uncreative the nomenclatures can be when it comes to bones--so we have osteoblasts, osteocytes, osteoclasts, osteoids, osteon, etc etc. Now the problem is differentiating which one does what.

I guess this is what I signed up for when I came into medschool.

(personally I enjoy remembering names)

Aside from that nothing interesting happened in class aside from Dumbslut, Koreanslut and Fatslut being asked to leave the lecture hall by the lecturer for talking too much during the lectures. I symphatize for them somewhat, but not too much.

Met my case study group after lectures, but again the meeting seemed somewhat unproductive (save for a few addition to our points for presentation) and I swear I could just curl up and die if I were to go to another one of these meetings if the only person that is going to speak is the team leader, one other person and I. Needless to say (but I'm going to say it anyway) I hate silent meetings, 'cause well, the chair in my room could do so much better.

Did the usual thing in the afternoon--sleep. I'm sorta sick-y anyway.

Since it was raining during dinnertime today our excursions to the stalls are cancelled--dinner today consists of instant noodles--which invariably lead me to be hungry again not 2 hours later, so we went out for supper at 11.

Guess that's all for today. Gosh I need something interesting to happen one of these days.

"Okay, so this is what happens when you kick your own balls"

2008-10-14T06:22:00.000-07:00

I find it really amazing how the human brain works at times--take, for an example, how we can study so much the night before a major assesment and score decent grades thereafter. So there I was from where I left of yesterday, studying my heart out for the PBL earlier today. Quite frankly, nothing went through, and if anything the episode of ANTM I watched with Animeslut didn't help much either.

Being the carefree soul I am, I figured a nice chat with my senior online would decidedly be less stressful to my brains--and so I did. So it went somewhere along the lines of:

"OMG have you watched Grey's Anatomy?"

"No."

"..so there's this procedure on the brain...fatal, blah blah"

"Don't remind me of the CNS. I'm still stuck with my PBL"

"Owh you're not done with it? Here lemme help you.."

And so about 2 hours or so of private tutoring online (at 1am, mind) started. My point is, I'm quite amazed at what I can cram into the noggin of mine at that hour of the day; it's not even taught until much, much later! Needless to say my mind has pretty much numbed itself after the mini lecture and by the time I got to bed it was probably 4 in the morning.

A few hours later I could've swore my head was not attached to my neck--sleep deprivation, I deduce, is not something that I would like to go through again. And then there's the first lecture on "treatment adherence", which I couldn't for the love of myself comprehend, 'cause we all know you can lead a horse to the water but you sure as hell can't make it drink (I cringe at the cliche, but at least it gets my point through.).

And there's also the fact that I fell asleep halfway through the darned lecture on why some idiots just wouldn't take their medications (hey, if they wanna die I'm pretty sure I can't do squat about it when all is said and done. I'm not gonna kill myself trying to make them do it, either.)

Well since a lot of my readers have complained that I'm just too wordy I'll spare my details on lunch today (serenaded by a bad singer. I died. >.<) Gotta catch up on sleep, anyway.

Can I do away with the titles? I can't think of anything else to say.

2008-10-13T08:47:00.000-07:00

quote of the day:

"I scratched the butt of my baby"--Anonymous, on having the car grazed by the lorry.

Sometimes I wonder who, really is the one that causes us to arrive at the lecture theater later than when we are actually supposed to. Yeah, so maybe I wake up a little later, but even with the ritual morning bath I almost always waiting for a certain housemate of mine to be done with her hair, make-up, etc.

Ah, me and my bitching.

So today was no different from any other day--we got into the lectures just in time, too. As usual (where it is almost imperative that something bad MUST happen before/during lecture), a stupid nobody took our (well Animeslut's, therefore my) place in the hall. Which lead me to sit somewhere else 'cause I don't really want to sit where I can't see the screen at all, nevermind if I can sleep better there.

The first lecture today was on muscles, which was pretty okay in any standards--the kind that you'd like to listen to but feel like sleeping all the while (my sentiments were somewhat in-between regarding the lecture). It would be unfair to say it was boring, however; anatomy has always interested me--and playing catch-up with the lecturer while making notes in class can be rather enjoyable. I could go on about what the lecture was about, but no one's gonna be interested, innit?

I find the breaks in between lectures too short today.

Let me tell you why.

By the second lecture my eyelids felt like the proverbial 10-tonne anvil, and the lecture was somewhat important--muscular contraction. I am not so surprised, however; the first 1/3rd of the lecture was spent on explaining the concepts which we were lectured on 15 minutes ago, which I must add is NOT something we would like to be repeated.

And so I endured about 45 minutes of myosin and tropomyosin and muscle fibers sliding against each other (yeah, weird, I know--it still hasn't sunk in yet) while juggling my consciousness between deep slumber and plain indifference (I considered the word apathy but I figured it's too strong a word). Meh, everything's in Marieb anyway (if that's any consolation).

Took of for lunch a little while later--and man, was it fun. Here's what happened: A certain friend of mine (yes, I am requested to not mention names) and friends (yours truly included) decided to have a meal at Subang and so we went on Nameunmentionable's car. Was okay for the first quarter of the journey (only noname and I was in the car, mind; the others have left already), until namecannotbesaid went into a turning lane and (to quote said person) "scratched the butt of my baby" when our vehicle was going straight.

Against a lorry on our left(uncouth, loud lorry driver included).

which was making a right turn.

(cue a lot of swearing on our part)

Once done with our expletives, I decided to perform a damage survey--and since this is a blog of a medstudent, allow me to explain the damages in our terms: there were superficial grazing on the lateral caudal end of the vehicle.

To put things in less words, the backside of the car was scratched.

So we talked a little with the lorry driver, friend played the innocent helpless card and we settled for a RM10 shush-shush fee. (nah, actually it's to get the poor helpless lorry driver to get paint so his boss doesn't find out).

Reached the Asia Cafe sometime later--it was packed, but I must say the choices here are wide. I got a japanese lunchbox set for RM14 which was rather filling. But since we arrived a little later due to the little mishap, all of our other friends were already done with their meals. Played foosball later, and I enjoyed it immensely; in fact I have beaten a tag team against me single (well double, actually but you get the idea) handedly. I feel proud.

Feh.

Went back to Uni later for a little study session in the library--nothing much to report here, really, 'cause all I did was drew a few pictures and borrowed 3 books (which I dont intend to finish anyway). PBL was still yet to be completed.

Afternoon nap as usual--can't live without them. Enough adventure for the day, mayhaps.

Woke up and had a microwave dinner later thanks to Animeslut; not that I'm complaining anyway. Then it's studytime and research for PBL (I swear these things are to make us miserable) up until now.

However since I know the value of commitment I am blogging now instead of PBL-ing. Back to PBL, then (since tomorrow's the day to present). Guess there's no sleep for me tonight.

Sunday morning; rain is falling

2008-10-12T09:56:00.000-07:00

Okay so maybe it wasn't pouring this morning, but I can't be too sure since I woke up rather late anyway. Well, the first thing I did was of course to check on my Facebook--it's getting increasingly indispensable, as the days go by, I swear. Having said that, however, I realized that I did have some unfinished assignments (darn the PBL) and so I spent about an hour or so researching on it. Animeslut came back around then with her parents (attended a wedding); father spent the whole time installing a peeping hole on her door. (When asked what is the purpose of the hole considering there's only the 3 of us at home, she replied something around the lines of "just in case the robbers come in and tie the both of you up then i'll know". I didn't question further.)

Meanwhile at 12pm, I had my first meal of the day.

Breakfast was somewhat ordinary, but considering how I usually skip my breakfasts it's amazing I actually decided to have one today. Crackers and grapes with a muffin. Hardly filling for someone who had not had anything for the past 16+ hours, but then again I am known to survive without food for long periods of time so I'm fine. The muffins were especially good (courtesy of the wedding)

Spent the subsequent hour or two drawing a mindmap for my case study group, which was somewhat fun--I haven't done anything even remotely related to arts (drawing in class doesn't count) for a long time, so this was a refreshing change of pace. The fact that I spent way too long on this particular activity was besides the
point.

It started raining a little while after that. I love rainy days--it gets me all emo and stuff.

So I waited under the trees downstairs while it was raining for the bus (that takes me to church) to arrive--it did a little while later, thankfully, 'cause really, no one wants to go to church soaking wet.

I actually enjoyed church today, but that's not really surprising since this church never failed to amaze me with powerful messages week after week (this week was good, cuz I had a bad week)--of course, the free dinner (which was some rice with rendang: yummy) was a huge plus as well. That's one less burden on my wallet. But let's not let them know that.

Came home after that on the bus. Strangely, I feel somewhat tired today--and I didn't even do much! Oh well. Back to PBL research again; that's the life of a medstudent, after all.

Oh joy.

You can dance, you can jive; having the time of your life!

2008-10-11T09:37:00.000-07:00

A lazy Saturday morning, indeed--I would have been better of without the alarm on my phone, since it practically snoozed me for a good 2 hours before I decided it would be more productive for me to wake up (defeating the purpose of having an alarm to begin with).

Usual affair: checked my FB, chatted around and did a little research on my PBL (again, that's Problem Based Learning to you), which needless to say was becoming increasingly a pain in the you-know-where. Dermatomes were okay, sensory modalities are bearable, but the ascending/descending tracts are really something outta this world. But then again I'm not even well-versed with the anatomy of the brain yet so I guess I shouldn't take things too hard.

Went to Timesquare to settle the billing problems with Umobile, but man, was the crowd at the centre unrefined. And the workers, slow. Considering how I have not had my lunch (it was 2pm by then, mind), my mood was somewhat sour. Got a bagel as soon as it was done (man I love those things) and rushed to beat the peak-hour crowd to the train--I headed to Midvalley next.

Since my appointment with a certain senior was not due till 7 (it was 3.30pm by the time I reached there), window shopping to my hearts desire was the right thing to do--and so I did. Got a new necklace (I'm a sucker for these things), a new stylus for my DS (first one wrecked by stabbing it on the bed repeatedly, second one lost and nowhere to be found). When I couldn't feel my legs anymore I headed to the bookstore and read for an houror so.

Met up with Kiryu-sempai soonafter (he acts so much differently online) and headed for Chili's for dinner. By then my hands were trembling and my head was somehow lost among the clouds, if you get what I mean. So being compulsed with a binge-spending habit today I ordered a lamb shank while Mr.Senior ordered some chicken whachamacallit. Spent half the time in akward silence, but it got better at the end. I was too hungry to talk much anyway.

We went for a movie after that-Mamma Mia-and while I was sorely tempted to dance and sing along on the aisle, poor Senior was probably bored and tired to death ('cause he watched another movie before meeting me). Surprisingly, I did not feel the urge to run for the loo as always mid-film (lol "Waterloo") but kept my attention on the screen most of the time.

Took a cab home right after that--I'm pretty tired today, so I'm signing off early. Have a *yawn* decent Sunday.

A moment in time

2008-10-10T07:11:00.000-07:00

Woke up to a nasty headache today; after the crap I went through the whole night I'd be surprised if I didn't, but I dragged my feet to Uni anyway today.

The first lecture was on "Reactions to Illness", which I vaguely remember (vaguely being the operative word here) what was it about. Truth to be told, I was simply too exhausted to concentrate and as a result I was somewhat lucid the whole time, falling in and out of sleep throughout the lecture--bearing in mind that this lecture was imperative for the completion of my assignment.

Note: emo-ing in class is not a very good idea, at least not in medschool.

Talked to Oldslut about it, and man, was she a comfort--I felt somewhat more invigorated for the next lecture, but then again it could be me finally waking up. And so the next lecture was on the skin, which though was admittedly thought to be boring turned out not too shabby after all. I was probably too busy taking notes to bother anyway but at least I wasn't tempted to sleep in class today.

Had a meeting with my case study group right after class--my leader made the decision to combine our group with another group (Adrian's), which I must say was a wise decision, considering how we lack the commitment on part of some members of our team. Discussion, however was a rather sordid affair--in fact, I'd rather not use the word discussion as most of the members (even from the other team) were too quiet and needed much prompting to even come out with an idea (but of course, whether the ideas were actually USABLE or not was an altogether different matter).

Ultimately, only a few of us came up with ideas but at least that was better than nothing. Was rather flattered when Adrian came up to me later and told me he was glad I was in the group--my contribution was apparently of much use. But of course I played coy--then again, that's me bragging.

Anyway.

I went out with Bala, Steph, Jonny, Esther and Adrian later for lunch at a restaurant in Godknowswhere (near Taylor's, anyone?) and had a great lunch--kept me distracted at least. Rushed back for CF and was a little late, but at least I didn't miss most of the activities. And so to drive a point home, they made us eat mashed-up hardboiled eggs with loads of salt in it. I'll leave the symbolism open to interpretation.

As usual, afternoon nap right up till dinnertime--this time I decided to join Mark and Eunice (Pui) for the HOMES session (courtesy of ACTS church). Had loads of fun there meeting new people and chatting--god knows how much I need one today, since my housemates will not be home until Sunday.

I really, really need a better day tomorrow.

And just when you thought things could not get any worse...

2008-10-09T05:54:00.000-07:00

If there's anything worse than having a lecture on Behavioural Science, it'll definitely be having a BS lecture with a substandard lecturer; which was what happened today. The first lecture was half an hour late, and to top it up the lecturer was scary as hell--he could tell a joke with a straight face and no one would know if he's serious or otherwise. So yeah, the lecture was on "Falling Ill", but I was personally falling ill myself (not literally, silly) in the lecture hall. If I remember correctly, he was mentioning about the definition of illness and delays in treatment on part of the patient but the others were in my opinion rather vague (the thought of falling asleep in class comes to mind). But seriously, this is nowhere as bad as the second lecture (which was also a BS topic), which was on "Pain".

I believe it wouldn't take a genius to figure out that it was, indeed, a pain to listen to. If my tone was any indication, this has to be by far one of the worst lecturers I have ever seen and I am not kidding when I said it was a pain: the akward pauses were quite tangible.

Of course, there's also the God-sent thing called a book which I read to numb out all the dull voice of the lecturer. I DID try my best to listen, really--but when only psychological theories are present (which may I add, is based on models alone), it is pretty difficult to accept it as it is.

Rushed off for band practice right after class: the bassist was much more well prepared this time around, but Mr.Keyboardist decided that having lunch would be a much more enticing prospect and Ms.Guitarist had to attend MMS (that's Medical Museum Session to you). Which ultimately left me with Mr.Drummer and Ms.Bassist to practice, and anyone in a band can attest that it is near impossible to practice effectively with only those two instruments; more so if the performance is ~1 hour away. But we practive we did. Somehow.

I somehow did manage to grab a slice of pizza and that's pretty much what i had for lunch--there's much work to do today.

The other musicians arrived 15 minutes before the performance; just in time for set-up. Consequently as a result of little practice the first song was rather screwed with the slight akward pause somwhere in the middle. I cringe just thinking about it. The other two songs, however were much more do-able, considering how we practiced it before (we recycled the song from the previous performance).

And then there's the packing part at the end, where I hate the most.

Attended MMS after a short break/jamming session in the Music Room and boy, was it fun. Sorta.

So this time around we had to study an ECG of a toad (don't ask me why) and answer questions based on it; but first of all do indulge me in a little bitching. So we were sitting at the tables, a few 13 or so of us; and the questions were in the middle of the table. Naturally a few would want to take a look at the questions, but some stupid girl (okay a few of them) at the opposite end of the table took the whole set of question and basically hogged it, leaving my friends and I for a good 15 minutes or so staring at them as they discussed it.

But the real blow on the balls came when they asked "Does anyone know how to answer these questions? I don't even understand what it means," to which I promptly replied with a dry "I would, if I could see the question to begin with". Suffice to say they got the message.

We got our question, and we discussed it--it wasn't too hard, actually but I guess some people just dont see the answers even if it poked them in the nether regions. It's not like we were not allowed to make references in the first place anyway. But alas we spent about half an hour more than we were allocated (because 2 friends of mine decided that debating with each other on a matter regarding the question was more important than completing the others).

Went home straight after, and slept till dinnertime. As usual, nasi lemak for the poor, lazy student who woke up too late to cook. Had a little row with my mum (as usual, but I believe we'll get over it. somehow.) and well, let's just say it was one of the worst.

Hoping for a better day tomorrow. God knows how much I need it.